Humour Books

Book SynopsisGrowing a baby? Got to name it? No sweat. Take naming inspiration from the ultimate, most kick ass men and women in history. This baby name book is an A-Z of total badasses, explains what gives them serious swagger and the reasons why they are worthy of being your future son or daughter's moniker. From the world-changers and fearless adventurers, to the whip-smart inventors and scientists of the last five centuries, why not name your little bundle after humans to admire, celebrate and love? Take name ideas from those who kicked Fascist ass to the kings and queens taking bravery to another level, or from a doctor with so much badassitude he saved his own life blindly removing his appendix in the middle of the Antarctic. This is the book for every parent-to-be looking for inspirational name ideas for their future badass baby.Trade ReviewIf you'd like to choose a name based on colourful characters in history, this book will entertain as well as inform! -- Juno magazineA really good study of names – specifically names of great rebels from history * Evergreen *

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Book SynopsisWelcome to the School of Pranks!As the Professor of Pranks, I'm going to be dissecting the secret ingredients within my world famous viral pranks! In other words show you how to become the best prankster there ever was! I'm going to guide you through a whole year of school... from History, where you'll be taught about the 10 best pranks ever, to Art, Biology, Drama Chemistry, Physics and PE, where you'll learn 30 brand new pranks to complete your education.I'll also take you out on school trips and introduce you to the teachers... Unless you want to be a monkey like Elliot then I suggest you start reading! Or if you want to find your inner prankster I'm going to show you how, just follow this textbook and you too could become a Pranking Master... now get to class!SORRY BRO.

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Book SynopsisTHE NO.1 SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER THE MADNESS, ABSURDITY, AND UTTER CHAOS OF BEING A PARENT FROM THE HOSTS OF THE NO.1 SMASH HIT PODCAST.What's it really like to be a parent? And how come no one ever warned Rob or Josh of the sheer mind-bending, world-altering, sleep-depriving, sick-covering, tear-inducing, snot-wiping, bore-inspiring, 4am-relationship-straining brutality of it all? And if they did, why can't they remember it (or remember anything else, for that matter)?And just when they thought it couldn't get any harder, why didn't anyone warn them about the slices of unmatched euphoric joy and pride that occasionally come piercing through, drenching you in unbridled happiness in much the same way a badly burped baby drenches you in milk-sick?Join Josh and Rob as they share the challenges and madness of their parenting journeys with lashings of empathy and extra helpings of laughs. Filled with all the things they never tell you at antenatal classes, Parenting Hell is a beguiling mixture of humour, rumination and conversation for prospective parents, new parents, old parents and never-to-be parents alike.READERS LOVE PARENTING HELL:'Best laugh out loud book on parenting''I laughed and cried! Not being a parent I can now appreciate everything my friends do a lot more!''Every parent needs to read this''Every parent or parent-to-be or parent-adjacent needs to read this! It's also surprisingly empowering for women - the way they include the wives perspectives is beautiful''An honest account of parenting with a welcome twist/dose of humour. Buy it! Gift it.''I laughed out loud many times and once had to go into another room because I thought I might wake my sleeping husband.'

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Book Synopsis- You know the key to having more energy has nothing to do with crystals and chakras... and everything to do with how much sleep you get.- You know that neglecting your friends will leave you destitute and lonely... but you're still too damn lazy to pick up your phone and get in touch.- You know you could get through your to-do list in half the time... yet you're still stalking your ex on Facebook.- You know you just need a kick up the backside... and that's what you'll find within the pages of this book.Get A F*cking Grip is the self-help book for people who hate self-help, offering simple no-nonsense advice that you can implement into all areas of your life, allowing you to get on with everything you've always wanted to do. Learning how to get a f*cking grip is the key to taking back control of your life.

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Book SynopsisUnfamiliar Familiars is a comprehensive and humorous handbook to finding and caring for the unconventional animal companion.This guide will help you find the animal best suited to your personality and particular magical needs.Animals include a narwhal (strong in clairvoyance and fencing), an albatross (best for sea-faring witches), or an earthworm (for garden-based magic and fish summoning). • Features real-world facts with a playful, magical spin • Includes a helpful quiz for finding your own familiar • Brimming with suggested names, strengths, weaknesses, and moreForget the toads and black cats: Every witch is unique, so shouldn't you have a familiar as one-of-a-kind and extraordinary as yourself? Unfamiliar Familiars is an entertaining and educational guide to a menagerie of magical, less-appreciated creatures that may just become your ideal partner in the arcane arts. • Filled with quirky, charming watercolor illustrations • Perfect gift for anyone who wants to find their own familiar, just as they love learning about their own horoscope, zodiac reading, or Pottermore Patronus • Sure to delight animal lovers who have a sense of humor • A visually gorgeous book that will be at home on the shelf or on the coffee table as a conversation starter • Add it to the shelf with books like Sad Animal Facts by Brooke Barker; Basic Witches: How to Summon Success, Banish Drama, and Raise Hell with Your Coven by Jaya Saxena and Jess Zimmerman; and The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit Deck and Guidebook by Kim Krans.

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Book Synopsis Fear!!! Scary, right? But what if the only thing we shouldn''t fear is fear itself?In this era of economic turmoil, climate catastrophe, and cliques of cool teens just waiting to make fun of your shoes, we live in a heightened state of fear. We''re afraid of the world and afraid of each other-but not nearly as afraid as we should be! And this absurdly hilarious survival guide demonstrates that being afraid of literally everything is the only guaranteed way to stay safe. Packed with lifesaving/fear-fanning illustrations, sidebars, jump scares, chilling one-liners, and more, these pages will keep readers safe from the scourges of love, technology, birds, education, jackalopes, their own bodies, their homes, and the world outside their own bodies and homes. Includes a bonus foldout Fear Map lurking in the inside back cover.A BOOK TO KEEP YOU SAFE IN THESE ANXIOUS TIMES: Anxious and fearful about the state of the world? Friend, you are not frig

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Book SynopsisFinally, the unwritten rules of Dadhood have been written in Dad Law. Since the dawn of time, all dads have understood that there are a set of rules for fathers-both old and new alike-that guide them to gleefully repeat terrible puns as well as to hone the perfect deadpan joke delivery. This handsome tome collects all of the governing laws of fatherhood, covering a vast array of conceivable situations ranging from fashion to tech to simply being a dad in public. At last, fathers need look no further to confirm that their instincts are 100 percent legally sound, whether it's to vigilantly guard the thermostat settings or to tell unsuspecting children "Hey, pull my finger." It's not a choice. It's a law: the Dad Law.

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Book Synopsis The average person spends about 50 billion hours on the toilet in their lifetime. Why not make the most of it? We''ve all been there and will be back again. This very funny and actually useful guide will help you make your time in the loo more comfortable, entertaining, and even fun. Out-and-about advice includes finding and navigating public restrooms, strategies for pit stops at school, in the office, or at other people''s houses, as well as special circumstances (in a porta-potty, in the woods, in outer space). Tips for optimizing your throne room at home feature playlists, dream decor, scent-sory suggestions, get-things-moving exercises, and toilet tech explorations (flush into the future). Also featuring a Things to Do While You Poo activities section, sidebar trivia from Plungie the Plunger, and reader missions to accomplish from Agent 002, this is the must-have companion for anyone''s time behind closed doors. FUN & USEFUL BATHROOM BOOK: A much better

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Book SynopsisWTF? THERE ARE WHISKERS IN THE WHISKEY!Cats love a drink! When you're not looking, your kitty is busy getting liquored up. This book gathers the best photos of cats getting buzzed off booze and looking pawfully pitiful the morning after. And to aid your appreciation, these snaps of sordid and sozzled pussycats have been paired with hilarious captions telling us what their meowing actually means. Bottoms up!

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Book SynopsisThe Golden Age of Bullshit.Welcome to the golden age of bullshit, a wiki-wild world knee deep in half-truths and alternative facts, spin and bias, influence and insincerity, little white lies and tall tales, falsehoods and propaganda, and all sorts of other baloney designed to disguise fact from fiction. We live in a post truth, fake news, world where nothing is quite as it seems and everything you read should be seen before believed. But isn't.From Brexit buses to Donald Trump, the University of Google to misleading advertising claims, and everything in-between, the bullshit keeps getting bigger and stronger and the lies are turning truer every day. It's time to call bullshit on bullshit!The Little Book of Bullshit is the ideal antidote everybody needs to fight the influx of excessive lying and cheating and defrauding that has come to define the 21st century, a tiny tome stuffed with delightfully witty snack-sized nuggets of facts and stats and quotes and boasts all related to the ever-expanding world of bullshit."The first rule of bullshit is that it must be believable." Nassim Nicholas Taleb"I'm almost finished..." All of us, at some point in our livesTable of ContentsAlternative Facts - Famous and historic lies in disguise and falsehoods that fooled the world! • The Unbelievable Truth - Stranger-than-fiction facts that are actually true! • Won't Get Fooled Again - The world's biggest bullshit artists, scoundrels, cheats, liars, phoneys and frauds exposed! • We're Gonna Need A Bigger Boast - Quotes and boasts too good to be true! • Lies, Damned Lies and Statistics - World-renowned statistics and irrelevant facts and figures that just don't add up! • Fake News - 'Post truth' stories and news reports that prove you shouldn't believe everything you read.

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Book SynopsisIn Austerity England, 1953, England have just won back 'The Ashes' from Australia after 19 years, but this is soon forgotten by the southern villages of Rotting Hill and West Rotting as they prepare for their annual cricket contest. The story follows the lives and loves of the villagers in the days preceding the contest, then the dramas and absurdities of the game itself as it descends into chaos, both during and after the match. In an England still ridden by class mores and dichotomies, the combatants meet on equal status on and off the field - snobs, vicars, barmaids, debs, trade union agitators, schoolmasters, dysfunctional artists and artisans, black-marketeers, minor aristocrats, bigots and traditionalists. There is a one-legged ex-naval commander, who still insists on captaining his team and opening the batting, whilst his alcoholic wife is having a steamy affair with the dashing ex-war hero vice-captain; an amorous vicar and warm-hearted barmaid. At the scorers' table, two women bitch at each other throughout the day, whilst an errant dog has a major influence on the outcome of the game. Just a jolly romp through the countryside of old England - the village cricket match.Trade ReviewThe modern successor to de Selincourt's and Parker's 'village' cricket match. Funny, outrageous and utterly credible - Camilla St.James, Winchmore Hill Tigers website

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Book SynopsisIt was love at first taste for fifteen-year-old Tadhg Hickey when he drank a can of Scrumpy Jack on the night of his exam results. Straight away it provided a cure for that constant feeling of 'something wrong, something not quite right', a way of numbing anxiety and childhood trauma. He realised he was extraordinarily good at drinking and energetically threw himself into a life of pubs, parties and staying pissed, while also managing to become a comedian. But alcohol had the last laugh ...A Portrait of the Piss Artist as a Young Man shows us the often-hilarious lengths of self-deception an alcoholic will go to, the horrific consequences of addiction and the redemptive process of recovering from this deadly but ultimately treatable illness, and remaining sober. A deeply touching memoir and with a side of self-help, Tadhg's easy-going writing style belies his serious message - that each of us has the power to change our lives.Trade Review'Tadhg has mastered the skill of making the difficult shit that us humans deal with in life accessible, through a beautiful irreverent cocktail of vulnerability, hilarity, emotional intelligence and charm' -- Niall Breslin, aka Bressie'An amazing story of addiction and redemption' -- Paul Howard * author of the Ross O’Carroll-Kelly series *'Hickey's memoir is self-deprecating and well-paced, but the liveliness is a smokescreen for his more serious intent. However familiar the addiction arc, Hickey's candour could actually really help people, especially those noticing the "craic" mutating into something decidedly less fun' * Irish Times *

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Book SynopsisMany musical and theatrical traditions walk the very narrow path between the sublime and the ridiculous, but perhaps none more so than opera, which, while maintaining an elegant reputation, makes a show out of princes making romantic speeches to soft fruit, noses being accidentally cut off and woodpeckers performing wedding ceremonies. Opera Obscura is a beautifully illustrated collection that contributes twenty-five brand new impossibly madcap operas to the canon of magnificent absurdities, along with the intricate blueprints for several incredible opera houses and information on of a whole range of almost unbelievably incredible instruments.

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Book Synopsis'"What?" said the reverend gent, "Dance through my hours of leisure? Smoke? Bathe myself with scent? Play croquet? Oh, with pleasure!"' Today W.S. Gilbert is best known for the comic operas he produced in collaboration with Arthur Sullivan, but another of his great - and numerous - literary contributions were his humorous ballads, written and illustrated under the pseudonym 'Bab'. Combining his trademark absurdist wit with keenly observed character studies, the ballads are a satirical tour de force that lambast society figures. This new selection, chosen and introduced by Andrew Crowther, Secretary of the W.S. Gilbert Society, brings together the very best of the ballads and presents the 'Bab' works for a new readership.Table of Contents‘W.S. Gilbert: A Brief Introduction’, ‘Introduction’, ‘Preface to The Bab Ballads (1869)’, The Bab Ballads: ‘Captain Reece’, ‘The Rival Curates’, ‘General John’, ‘Haunted’, ‘The Troubadour’, ‘Ferdinando and Elvira’, ‘Babette’s Love’, ‘To My Bride’, ‘Sir Macklin’, ‘The Yarn of the Nancy Bell’, ‘The Bishop of Rum-Ti-Foo’, ‘The Precocious Baby’, ‘Thomas Winterbottom Hance’, ‘A Discontented Sugar Broker’, ‘The Ghost, the Gallant, the Gael and the Goblin’, ‘At a Pantomime’, ‘Thomson Green and Harriet Hale’, ‘The Story of Prince Agib’, ‘Ellen McJones Aberdeen’, ‘Peter the Wag’, ‘Joe Golightly’, ‘Gentle Alice Brown’, ‘Mister William’, ‘The Bumboat Woman’s Story’, ‘Pasha Bailey Ben’, ‘Lieutenant-Colonel Flare’, ‘Lost Mr Blake’, ‘The Baby’s Vengeance’, ‘Annie Protheroe’, ‘Gregory Parable, LL D’, ‘Brave Alum Bey’, ‘Sir Barnaby Bampton Boo’, ‘The Modest Couple’, ‘My Dream’, ‘The Haughty Actor’, ‘The Two Majors’, ‘Emily, John, James and I’, ‘The Perils of Invisibility’, ‘The Fairy Curate’, ‘The Way of Wooing’, ‘Etiquette’, Notes, ‘The Selected Ballads in Chronological Order’

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Book Synopsis‘So let’s build the tension – everybody put your hands on your legs and give us a drum roll please! Stamp your feet! Here we go!’ It’s the final performance of a Cinderella panto in a moth-eaten, regional theatre, and backstage tensions between the ugly sisters are threatening to boil over on to the stage. Will the egotism, one-upmanship and sexual politics remain confined to the dressing room, or will the bitter rivalry and jealousy between the two actors steal the show? Oh No It Isn’t! is a brilliantly observed, raucous yet moving new play exploring the highs and lows of life in the theatre.Trade Review'Witty and heartfelt.' (Karen Bussell, British Theatre Guide) 'Entertaining and insightful… I haven’t laughed so much in a single show for quite some time.' (Chris Omaweng London Theatre 1)

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Book SynopsisThe Flatshare meets a modern You've Got MailDo you believe in love at first type? When Ada set up her own PR firm from a coffee shop, she didn't expect to meet journalist Fraser. Also working there daily, he soon becomes a friend. Reporting on interesting things to do around Edinburgh, Fraser ropes Ada into accompanying him on his assignments. As they work side-by-side Ada can't help but notice how attractive Fraser is, and how well they get along. But, Ada has been chatting to a guy she met on an Agatha Christie fan fiction site, and she can't stop wondering about him. His interests are the same as hers, and the anonymity helps them both be more honest and open. As Ada's messages with the mystery man become deeper, she thinks she's falling for him. Ada is torn between Fraser and Myster-E - but can you have real feelings for someone when you're virtual strangers?Trade ReviewSam Canning has written a romance it's so easy to fall in love with. I adored every moment of Ada and Fraser's budding relationship - and her heart-to-hearts online with Myster-E. Ada is such a vibrant, brilliant character throughout. Funny, sweet, and full of warmth. * Beth Reekles, author of The Kissing Booth *Delightful. An upbeat, fun-filled read about life, love and learning about yourself. * Gillian Harvey *Warm, witty and wise: a story that reminds us that while we all love a mystery, life is a lot less complicated when we're honest. * Gillian Harvey *

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Book SynopsisEver been late? Steve has. Lots. But he always has a good excuse. Here are 101 real corkers for you to enjoy. And maybe even borrow... * Distracted by a surprisingly complicated Kinder toy* Overcome by the urge to alphabetise my pets * Forgot how trousers work* Became temporarily feral* Got stuck in a romantic montage Why Steve Was Late is a book of hilarious (and even - occasionally - plausible!) reasons for tardiness, handily dreamed up and illustrated by someone else.Trade ReviewFunny, ingenious, I loved it. -- Adam KayHenry Paker and Dave Skinner are absolutely hilarious. Steve is an absolute liability. -- Josh WiddicombeThis book is great. Can't say any more. Late for work. -- Jo BrandThis book should be in itself yet another reason to be late. Brilliant. Stock up on excuses here. -- Al Murray, the Pub LandlordI love Steve. He's hilarious. * Michael McIntyre *

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Book SynopsisA wonderful book for aficionados, actors, academics, and audiences alike. This is a unique introduction and guide to Shakespeare’s life and times, a uniquely modern take on Shakespeare by a man uniquely qualified to write about him. Imagines Shakespeare having to deal with the attitudes of modern times.

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Book SynopsisA helpful and positive illustrated guide to exacting the change in the world you want to see, using the tools you already have at your disposal. The mood in the world right now isn't good. Some of us might be feeling let down by our governments, or watching the rich and poor divide increase, or losing sleep over the large country of plastic floating in the Pacific ocean. But we mustn't feel defeated or hopeless. There are so many positives about this time we are living through. And one of those plenty of positives? *You and I have never had so much opportunity to make change!* No matter how big or small your cause, with 101 simple tips and tricks you can do to get your attitude in gear, treat change like business, rally your troops and strategise your success, Fuck the Establishment will have you changing the world in no time. You go Glen Coco!

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Book SynopsisThe warm, funny and entertaining memoir of much-loved TV personality and loveable posh boy, Jamie Laing.Funny, charming, and romantic to a fault, everyone loves Jamie Laing. The affectionate and exuberant blonde puppy dog has come a long way - and broken many hearts - since he first graced our screens in 2011 as the joker of the King's Road on Made in Chelsea. Ten years on, he became king of the ballroom making the final of Strictly Come Dancing. Now he's ready to spill the tea - and (McVitie's) biscuits - about life, love and everything in between.From his idyllic upbringing in the countryside to the grey walls of boarding school, Jamie has always had a knack for getting himself into trouble. He reveals how he won popularity at school teaching the rest of the boys the proper way to ... [PARENTAL ADVISORY]. He hilariously recounts blagging his way into a casino aged 17, and winning so much money his mother thought he was a drug dealer. Jamie has been equally lucky with ladies, but not always quite the romantic hero he had in mind - unless sitting lovelorn outside a girlfriend's halls begging to be taken back while fending off abuse from drunk students calling out 'Made in Chelsea twat' counts as heroism?Jamie also writes movingly about his struggles off camera, which left him crippled with anxiety and led to his eventual burnout. Throughout it all he opens up about the importance of friendship and how his two ride-or-dies, Georgie and Spencer, have always been there for him. They've enabled Jamie to thrive as a confectionery king and genuinely change lives with his Private Parts podcast, while not letting him forget that he took part in The Great Celebrity Bake Off for Stand Up To Cancer despite not knowing how to pronounce the word 'meringue'. Candid, entertaining, and almost always ridiculous, this is the real Jamie Laing.

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Book SynopsisMen with Asperger's Syndrome, young and old, experience difficulty with social interaction, which can be a stumbling block when it comes to getting a girlfriend. Here is a book that demystifies the enigma of 'relationships' by explaining everything in Asperger-friendly terms (some of them mathematical, naturally).Asperger Meets Girl provides hope for all hopeless wooers by offering a choice of three interrelated abstract models for understanding boy-girl relationships. And, to make life easier, these models are presented in graph form where possible. The book also gives valuable practical tips for maximising one's chances of successfully developing a relationship, such as how to start a conversation without scaring the other person off, avoiding the inclination to stare and understanding the concept of 'personal space'.Serious, and seriously funny, this book will help bring happy endings to Asperger boys and make them laugh in the process.Trade ReviewA book that demystifies the enigma of relationships by explaining everything in "Asperger-friendly" terms. -- Current Awareness Service...invaluable and should be shown to all teenagers whether they have a diagnosis or not. -- Asperger East AngliaThere are some very important lessons in this book. -- Asperger UnitedTable of ContentsForeword. Preface.1 What problem am I trying to solve here? 2. A Nerd's Eye View of Human Sexuality. 2.1 Idea 1: The Space of Possibilities. 2.1.1 Plotting Some Points in the Space. 2.1.2 Old-fashioned Romance. 2.1.3 Swinging. 2.1.4 Student Fantasy. 2.1.5 Coming Up Roses. 2.1.6 Slippery When Wet 2.2 Idea 2: The Conventional Games. 2.2.1 The Conventional Male Game. 2.2.2 The Conventional Female Game. 2.2.3 And?. 2.2.4 Revisiting the Extracts. 2.3 Idea 3: Relationship Space. 2.3.1 Graphs of Relationship Space. 2.3.2 How Much Do You Love Me? Quantitative Attributes of Relationships. 2.3.3 Subjectivity of Relationships. 2.3.4 Intermission. 2.3.5 Defining the Centre. 2.3.6 Why Can't People Just Say What They Mean? 2.3.7 The Extracts Revisited (Again). 3. Things to Try. 3.1 The Collusive Relationship. 3.1.1 Why So Slow? 3.1.2 What Does This `Collusion' Involve? 3.1.3 Where Does It Get You? 3.2 How Sex Joins On to Real Life. 3.2.1 Sensuality. 3.2.2 Attention. 3.2.3 Power. 3.3 Strategic Preparation. 3.3.1 Get a Body. 3.3.2 Get a Persona. 3.3.3 Get a Look. 3.3.4 Your Fellow Men. 3.3.5 Platonic Women. 3.3.6 Good Persistence and Bad Persistence. 3.4 Tactical Preparation. 3.4.1 Tactical Goals. 3.4.2 Times and Places. 3.4.3 Your Fellow Men (Again). 3.4.4 Look (Again). 3.5 Contact. 3.5.1 Staring and Personal Space. 3.5.2 The Art of Apology 3.5.3 Conversation. 3.5.4 Your Feelings, Considered from a Tactical Point of View. 3.5.5 The Last Mile. 3.6 No, Actual Contact. 3.6.1 Confidence. 3.6.2 Decisiveness. 3.6.3 Herself in Particular. 3.6.4 Colluding Again. 4. Afterword. 5. Appendix: Some Supplementary Thoughts. 5.1 Theoretical Context. 5.1.1 Philosophy. 5.1.2 Psychoanalysis. 5.2 Cartesian Diagrams of the Space of Possibilities. 5.2.1 Old-fashioned Romance. 5.2.2 Swinging. 5.2.3 Student Fantasy. 5.2.4 Coming up Roses. 5.3 Suggested Para-academic Research. 5.3.1 Para-academic? 5.3.2 Numbers for the graphs. References.

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Book SynopsisIn the summer of 2000 a young Irish journalist returned from New York to launch a magazine about life in boomtown Dublin. The Dubliner was an instant failure, and within a few months it was close to bankruptcy. For the next seven years Trevor White struggled to keep the magazine afloat. Along the way he managed to alienate nearly everyone in Ireland. The Dubliner Diaries is an awkward history of the Celtic Tiger by a man who tried to capture it, and ended up being mauled.Trade Review[The Dubliner Diaries is] a smart and engaging read’. – Frank Coughlan, The Irish Independent. ‘Thoughtful, often hilarious and endearingly self-deprecating. Trevor White might well be the pompous so-and-so he admits to being. But he’s also the most likeable pompous so- and-so in Ireland today … One of the funniest and most astute pieces of writing yet on the national midlife crisis we briefly called the Celtic Tiger.’ – Paul Howard, aka Ross O’Carroll-Kelly

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Book SynopsisIt's time to get down and even dirtier with this second selection of the filthiest gags you're ever likely to hear. "100 Dirty Jokes for Girls" is all you need to give you a naughty thrill and is jam-packed with outrageous stories, punchlines and one-liners that are guaranteed to have you and your mates laughing out loud. And, because all women know that men and sex make a hilarious double act, the book includes jokes on chat-ups, dirty talk, foreplay, penis size, orgasms and between-the-sheets mishaps, making it a side-splitting read and proving that - in this case at least - size doesn't matter. So, move over Christina Aguilera - you're not the only dirty girl in town!Table of ContentsMore than 100 great jokes, in the style of the highly popular Dirty Girls Joke Book.

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Book SynopsisJames Crosbie was Britain's most wanted man in 1974. With a successful business and an enviable lifestyle, he seemed to have everything going for him - until he got bored with his life and turned to armed robbery. He ended up in Peterhead Prison, doing time with some of the hardest, and funniest, men in crime. Peterhead Porridge is a remarkable account of the people he met. People like The Saughton Harrier who escaped from prison by dressing up as a runner, complete with running vest and number, and joining in as a race went by. And another escapee, Tweety Pie, was so-called because, when he flew the coop, he had a nasty case of jaundice. Then there's Square Go, the prison warder who was always up for a fight. And discover the practical jokes that were the trademark of Glasgow's Godfather Arthur Thompson and what really happened when someone poured their porridge over his head in the breakfast queue. Funny, sad and at times barely believable, Peterhead Porridge is a unique insight into the other side of prison life.

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Book SynopsisIf there's one thing that sets Weegies apart, it's our sense of humour. Come crisis time, we not only laugh in the face of danger, but we spit on its shadow, follow it around, and occasionally set about it. Take John Smeaton, the baggage handler who clobbered the Glasgow Airport terrorists. He showed the kind of heroism, down-to-earth decency and self-deprecating humour that we all aspire to, and it turned him into an instant worldwide icon. Mere houses after he'd banjoed the terrorists the jokes started. Some of them are in here. "This is Glasgow. We'll set about ye." Got the t-shirt yet? Bin Laden's got one. And he's not coming back, at least not on John's shift. As well as paying homage to El Smeato, The Almost Completely Ultimate Weegie Jokebook is a collection of stories, jokes and anecdotes about the things that make us laugh - ourselves mostly. You are either on the Glesca bus or you're not. Welcome aboard.

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Book SynopsisThis is the popular best-seller in a revised and updated new edition. The world is full of TV doctors, but only Dr Phil has appeared on "Have I Got News For You" seven times and "Coutdown" nineteen times, a true mark of greatness (whatever Lord Winston says). He is also Private Eye's medical correspondent and possibly the only comic to have appeared at a Public Inquiry. Dr Phil (46, Capricorn) has worked in the NHS for twenty years but only used it twice. He takes no drugs (apart from Australian Shiraz) and has never knowingly been Rolfed. So how does he remain so healthy? And what sort of Doctor is he? Here, at last, are transcripts of his most life-enhancing consultations and comedy, including 89 Minutes to Save the NHS.Trade ReviewOne of the most entertainingly subversive people on the planet * The Guardian *

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Book SynopsisThe traditional rivalries run deep between Glasgow's industry-blighted East End and the leafy suburban academia of the West End. The typical West Ender viewpoint is that the East End is full of workshy junkies and your average East Enders knows fine that the West End is populated by jumped-up snobs, but a shared sense of humour means that everything is just hunky-dory. 'Aye right', as we say in Glasgow when we mean: 'No way'.These rivalries are ancient, sometimes vicious, and run as deep at the Styx, but nowadays the main weapon is humour. People in the West are reacting to the suggestion that the Commonwealth Games is being shared by the city: 'Shared is it? Aye, the East End is getting it and we're paying for it'. These are the tall tales, the tantrums and the taradiddles told by both sides. Laugh? You'll probably flit to Edinburgh.

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Book SynopsisA side-splitting collection of the most earnest and mangled attempts at the English language made by generations of schoolchildren. Be they funny, irreverent or just plain silly, Mr McGreevy's Absolute Howlers are guaranteed to have you weeping with laughter. Four separate editions cover howlers in Science, History, English and Geography.Includes, amongst hundreds of others, the following howlers:Coal is decayed vegetarians.Socrates died of an overdose of wedlock.Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak.The King wore a scarlet robe trimmed with vermin.In the middle of the 18th Century all the morons moved to Utah.The German Emperor's lower passage was blocked by the English.The French Revolution was caused by overcharging taxis.Nets are holes surrounded by pieces of string.In biology today we digested a frog.The seventh commandment is 'Thou shall not admit adultery'.Pompeii was destroyed by an overflow of saliva from the Vatican.A census taker is a man who goes from house to house increasing the population.Adolescence is the stage between puberty and adultery.

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Book SynopsisPresents an array of tricks that baffle and amaze.Table of ContentsIntroduction: how and when to trick for best effect; Practical Jokes and Tricks; A chapter of classical practical jokes for everyone (except the victim) to enjoy. Leave your friends and enemies with egg on their face (literally) or humiliated (but happy!); Card Tricks; The best card tricks around, a surprising number of which require only the barest minimum of skill - and a pack of cards.; Bar Tricks; How to amaze your friends while you're out for a drink, from juggling change to picking up ice cubes with cotton thread.; Tricks With Everyday Objects; A chapter of tricks to perform any time, anywhere - in the kitchen, at work or even in the bank queue.

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Book SynopsisJust when you thought it was safe to go back in the West End… West End Producer, the masked man of Theatreland and author of the definitive guide to acting*, returns with the ultimate guide to the theatregoing experience – for anyone who's ever been to the theatre, or who thinks they might like to try it one day. As the Godfather of theatre producers, with an enviable track-record in uncovering new talent (via his competitions Search for a Twitter Star and Search for a Twitter Composer) and a regular column in The Stage newspaper, WEP is a cult figure in London's theatre scene, frequently attending press nights with his trusty Jean Valjean teddy by his side. Now he's ready to share his industry secrets once again, this time coming to the aid of audience members everywhere as they embark on the most perilous quest of all: going to the theatre. Packed with insider know-how and naughty advice, this book will tell you how to make your West End adventure as smooth as Craig Revel Horwood's nose, including tips and advice on: What shows to see and what to avoid (how to see the hits and not the shits) Where to sit (without developing ongoing neck problems and deep vein thrombosis) How to combat theatre rage (and get to the ladies' loos before anyone else) What to eat (crisps, sweets, or kebabs?) What to wear (from the correct attire at press night, to the importance of a good, reliable codpiece at Shakespeare's Globe) And, crucially, how to leave early if the show is rubbish (a 'shrubbish') It will even help you save a bit of money as well.** Also included are many of WEP’s most wickedly astute tweets, potted histories of some of the greatest West End shows, and handy instructions on how to become one of West End Producer's Theatre Prefects – protecting theatres from phone users, snorers, and persistent latecomers. So, put on your nicest frock, grab your tickets, and don't be late. This book will begin in five minutes. I repeat: five minutes, dear. 'All the crucial facts, naughty wit and insider knowledge that every theatregoer needs to have. Hysterically accurate, bitingly savage. Read this before buying your theatre ticket. Fab-u-lous, darling!' Craig Revel Horwood 'This book had me snorting prosecco out of my nostrils, dear. Hilarious yet chock-full of insider tips – and some stuff we all think about the theatre we know and love, but wouldn’t dare say whilst sober. Glorious.' Meera Syal 'West End Producer is shaping up to be the theatre's version of William Goldman: funny, astute and incisive, slyly twitching aside the curtains of the West End to reveal its most embarrassing secrets. A must for theatre-lovers (and haters).' Joanne Harris 'WEP does it again! His shrewd observation and deliciously waspish words neatly skewer and illuminate the rarefied world of theatre. I recommend everyone to read the section on what not to say to actors and applaud WEP's suggestion of a Theatre Prefect Programme. Theatre may be too dear – but WEP is very dear too.' Colin Baker * Everything You Always Wanted To Know About Acting, But Were Afraid To Ask, Dear ** After all, the Dom Pérignon won't buy itself.Trade Review'Go and buy several copies of this book and give it to your luvvie friends… the perfect combination of real knowledge and witty, slightly silly jokes that make you feel like an insider… a joy' * Drama Magazine *'Definitely the best theatre book of 2017… funny because it's so irreverently acute… anyone who teaches drama, goes to the theatre, works in the industry, is training to do so, or would like to, will recognise all this and smile. And at times they will split their sides. Buy several copies!' * Ink Pellet *'Hilarious but accurate... wonderful' * The Stage *'Packed with info and full of inventive innuendo' -- Baz Bamigboye * Daily Mail *'There's a lot crammed into this book, everything is in there' * The Curtain Up Show *'Provides a laugh a minute with every page turn' * Broadway World *'It's accessible, very readable, and gives a comprehensive no-holds-barred overview about every aspect of attending the theatre… for all the humour, this genuinely is a book that can be used as a guide to actual theatregoing' * LondonTheatre1 *

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Book SynopsisDid you give school history lessons your undivided attention? Even if you did, youre probably none the wiser as to how exactly Henry II of France came to have a two-foot splinter in his head or why Alexandra of Bavaria believed she had swallowed a piano. Or where terms like bunkum, maverick, John Bull and taking the mickey come from; or how the Tsarina of Russia once saved a life with a comma; or why Robert Pate hit Queen Victoria on the head with a walking stick. For some unknown reason the most interesting bits of history are kept out of lessons and away from syllabuses. Relegated to historys footnotes, they lie buried beneath the dense text like a few golden nuggets in a mountain of granite. Now The Interesting Bits rights this wrong; it is a veritable treasure trove of those surprising, eccentric, chaotic, baffling asides that dont fit neatly into historys official narrative. They are historys little-known treasures the gems that generations of teachers have excised from lessons on the grounds that they might make history too much like well fun.Trade Review'Comical and interesting...small but informative...Pollard combines eccentricity with stories of monumental mishaps making for an enjoyable, educating and uproarious read' * Catholic Herald, Christian Cudd *'Newsflash: history can be entertaining and interesting ... an energetic, colourful book' * Easy Living Magazine *

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Book SynopsisThe history of science is often seen as a story of advancement but nothing could be further from the truth. Science, it is true, has progressed, but rarely in the direction intended and seldom for the reasons given. This has a lot to do with the people responsible.Meet Thales, credited as 'the father of science', whose only real claim to fame is that he often fell into ditches, discover how Archimedes never said Eureka and hated baths anyway and how the most lucrative ancient Greek invention was not democracy but the slot machine.Justin Pollard also fills us in on Issac Newton who liked to disguise himself and lurk in London's less salubrious pubs, how eleven people claimed to have invented the steam engine and why the first website was twelve foot across and made of wood.Trade Review'An illuminating read' * Financial Times *'This approachable and often funny compendium of tales about scientists and their discoveries is also making an important argument: that science is not the stately, dispassionate progress from evidence to theory that some of its self-appointed defenders think' * Guardian *'Addictive' * Independent *

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Book SynopsisTerence is sick of people making a fuss of Alexander. His looks. His money. His fame.Who wouldn't resent so successful a son?Even if he is only ten years old.Joseph Connolly's brilliant new comedy of manners weaves together a domestic tableaux of characters - those with old-fashioned manners, tabloid manners, and no manners at all - in a satire on oedipal envy, neighbourly rivalry and the shameless stupidity of our fame-fuelled society.

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Book SynopsisThe biggest and best collection of jokes for all the family to enjoy. 8,000 rib-ticklers, covering every subject under the sun from Aardvarks to Zombies, including chicken jokes, doctor-doctor jokes, elephant jokes, horror jokes, knock-knock jokes, excruciating puns, riddles, school jokes, sports jokes and waiter jokes. Most of the jokes are sharp one-liners but there is also a scattering of slightly longer stories.

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Book SynopsisHave you ever found that once you are between the sheets Madame Bovary is too heavy, magazines are too slippery, and The Guns of Navarone too long? In that case A Gentleman's Bedside Book is perfectly designed to satisfy those final moments of the days with facts, stories, ideas and instructions that will help every bright boy to become a smarter man with a well rounded curriculum of lessons in Science, English, Home Economics, R.E, Modern Languages, P.E, Art, Music and Woodwork. A lucky dip of bedside derring-do, humour, and oddity, written in his unique style by best-selling humourist Tom Cutler. Constantly surprising, ridiculously fascinating, and very, very funny.Includes such entries as: Human anatomy for the practical man; the most frequent dream subjects; delicious caustic curries you can make; Emergency meals from nowhere; Shaving: top tips from the pros; Deerstalkers and why they matter; How to grow a dashing moustache; How to open a Champagne bottle with a sword; Samuel Pepys: the rude bits; Best ever book titles; Tongue twisters; Those you may not marry, from The Book of Common Prayer; The worst ever movie dialogue; Useful foreign chat-up lines; An international swearing dictionary; filthy foreign food; Historic dumb predictions; The history of concrete; Dad rock; Coming out on top in a pub brawl; How to dissolve your wife; Mental arithmetic tricks for the practical man: ten tricks; Famous car crashes and victims; The seven habits of the highly effective Lothario; Really bad chat-up lines; Best urban legends: a list; Sword swallowing for fun and profit; How to develop a gigantic memory; Mind blowing mind reading for the complete novice.Trade ReviewA brilliant read. * Who's Jack *The perfect stocking filler for the man who has everything. * Oldie *Review. * Living North *

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Book SynopsisWith old age comes grey hair, dodgy knees, a sudden passion for re-runs of Murder, She Wrote, and an apparent God-given licence to speak one's mind and be generally offensive without fear of retribution. Under the guise of passing on the benefits of their experience to family members or just casual acquaintances, old people exercise their right to swear, cuss and insult as they please. These feisty philosophers take no prisoners as they use their scalpel-like tongues to dissect modern life and the younger generations. If challenged over their outrageous comments, they'll play the age card: you know the sort of thing - 'I'm eighty-six, I've fought for my country, and if I want to call you a no-good, lowdown, useless fuckwit, then I'll call you a no-good, lowdown, useless fuckwit, Vicar.'Other gems include:It bugs me when people say, 'Life is short.' What the hell does it mean? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does! Are they going to do something that's longer? Son, if it's got tits or tyres, you're gonna have trouble with it. We all have our disappointments in life, son, and I'm talking to mine right now.The only way in which life resembles a bed of roses is that you encounter a lot of pricks along the way. Sure I'm surprised you can't get a job, son. I heard the world was crying out for someone who is lazy, has no qualifications but can spit gum into a waste paper basket from ten feet.Don't you think you might stand a better chance of becoming a captain of industry if you got rid of some of that metal shit on your body - like the nose stud and the eyebrow rings? Donald Trump may have a crap haircut but I bet he doesn't have pierced fucking nipples.Son, if life was fair, Elvis would still be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.The secret of a happy life is to run out of cash and air at exactly the same time.

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Book SynopsisWhen an unscrupulous shopkeeper settles a debt with Fantasio by offering him a mysterious 'gizmo', the reporter has no idea how much trouble is following in the thing's wake. It turns out to be a sort of robot that soon takes our heroes on a mad chase leading to Champignac - and an equally mysterious young woman sequestered in a cellar. And as if that wasn't enough, every electrical appliance in town seems to be going haywire...

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Book SynopsisChoosing how to behave in unfamiliar situations is one of the many minefields with which modern life abounds. In this amusing yet practical guide to modern manners, Her Ladyship offers invaluable advice on every aspect of etiquette, both royal and everyday. With guidance on basic good manners in a range of situations, whether at home, at work or abroad, as well as advice on what to wear when, eating out and dating, you will never again worry about awkward or embarrassing encounters. If you’ve ever wondered how to meet and greet the Queen and other royals, how to correctly address party invitations or about elegant ways of sitting down, standing up and getting in and out of cars, this guide is for you.

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Book SynopsisYouTube is the world's number one video-sharing website and hosts over 150 million clips, many with the power to make us laugh, gasp and even shed a tear. The Most Awesome YouTube Videos Ever! is an expertly curated collection of the website's greatest clips and a celebration of the continuing creativity of YouTube posters. Exploring 150 clips and with each entry carrying a QR code, the reader is instantly able to watch the site's most amazing clips. From the world famous and global viral hits to highly creative and the not so well known, this is the perfect gift for YouTube fanatics or those new to the site.Table of ContentsThe book features 150 of YouTube's most hilarious, breathtaking and awesome clips.

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Book SynopsisIf you are the sort of person who has ever had a spare moment at work (and let's face it who isn't) then this is the book for you. A neat little pocket format means you will never be without access to its stress-relieving pages.Finish the doodles, create your own and generally have fun at work with the Bored at Work Pocket Doodle Book!Creative, fun, partly finished doodles and other ideas adorn every page of this hilarious book. Sharpen your pencil to scribble in the spaces, colour in the shapes and add your own works of art.

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Book SynopsisA lot of leather has 'plunk-plicked' against willow since cricket was first played on the village greens of Olde England, but this doughty little book heroically manages to capture the true essence of the noble ball game in just 100 run-grabbing moments (plus a few extras for overthrows). This is the story of cricket as it has never been told before: a well tossed-up compilation of surreal match reports, spoof correspondence and quirky cartoons. From a Great Victorian refusing to walk (even though his bails have been knocked off by the bowler) to modern-day sledgers playing floodlit pyjama cricket, the game's towering achievements, hilarious happenings and ludicrous coincidences are entertainingly recalled. The book's title says it all: which other sport would have Silly positions in the field? For those who don't know, silly mid-off (facing the batsman) & silly mid-on (behind him) field within a couple of metres of the man at the crease as he flails at the ball, delivered at 140kmh, using a 1kg wooden bat. Table of ContentsWG Grace • The Bodyline Tour • Wars of the Roses • Don Bradman • Denis Compton • Neil Harvey • Lord Ted • Monkeys in the gully • Jim Laker • Lillian Thomson • Gillette Cup • Dolly and Apartheid • Deadly Derek • Chuckers and pie-throwers • 'Sir Geoff' • Kerry Packer's Circus • Big Bird • Ian Botham • Windies 'Blackwash' • Mike Gatting • The Headingley Comeback • Lara's 501 • Hansie Cronje • Shane Warne • Freddie Flintoff • Kevin Pietersen • Players Walkout • DRS.

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Book SynopsisGrandma - You're the Best! is a glorious collection of more than 300 quotes celebrating grandmothers and grannies everywhere. Grandmas have deservedly attracted thousands of amazing quotes, thoughts and observations and this unique anthology features contributions from the deeply philosophical to the wonderfully humorous, and is the perfect present to say thank you for all your grandma's love, kindness and compassion. With witty and wonderful quotes from the stars of stage, screen and literature, the worlds of music, comedy and politics, Grandma - You're the Best! makes for a delightful book and gift.

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Book SynopsisThe Best Wife in the World is a special collection of more than 300 quotes honouring the joys of being married to your soul mate. This wonderful collection of quotes features contributions ranging from the deeply philosophical to the brilliantly humorous. It is the perfect present for saying thank you to your wife – for her love, support and strength. With witty and wise quotes from the stars of stage, screen and literature, the worlds of music, comedy and politics, The Best Wife in the World makes for a delightful book and a thoughtful gift. 'The secrets of success are a good wife and a steady job. My wife told me.' Howard Nemerov. 'My most brilliant achievement was my ability to be able to persuade my wife to marry me.' Winston Churchill. 'I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.' Rodney Dangerfield. Table of ContentsContains more than 300 quotes about wonderful wives, from the deeply personal to the brilliantly humorous.

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Book SynopsisLike your office's fed-up printer, The Little Book of Office Bollocks is filled with enough fun and lively banter to boost your Monday-thru-Friday fun for the next few years.This super pocket-sized collection of fun and activities is designed to banish open-plan office boredom and is crammed with hilarious pranks and jokes. Includes advice on how to pull a sickie, ways to annoy your boss (without getting fired) and how to create works of art using office stationery.

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Book SynopsisThis is the story of golf as it's never been told before. A dog-legged compilation of sports reports, spoof correspondence and reminiscences from pros, caddies, playing partners and armchair pundits: Mary Queen of Scots cheers herself up at the links at Leith following the murder of her husband Lord Darnley; Dwight D. Eisenhower's valet shoots the breeze as he clears up the Oval Office following a particularly gruelling Presidential putting practice session; Bob Hope's chauffeur experiments with some one-liners whilst waiting for his boss in the clubhouse car park; and John Daly's local bartender describes the unique skills of his best customer. The albatrosses, the Big Berthas, the yips and the holes-in-one that have provided the perfect excuse to linger at the nineteenth hole are amusingly recalled for the delectation of the Fair Isle sweater brigade.Table of ContentsMary Queen of Scots * James IV of Scotland * Rembrandt * Tarby * President Eisenhower * Bing Crosby * Nick Faldo * Lee Trevino * The R&A * Sun City crocodiles * St Andrews * Anika Sorenstam * Augusta, Georgia * Golf on the Moon * Tony Jacklin * The Pro-Am circuit * Frenchman in the water * Golf buggies * Big Bertha and Mashie Niblick * Knickerbockers * P.G. Wodehouse * Tiger * The Golden Bear * Seve * Arnie's Army * Greg Norman * Nick Faldo * How a Chicago Cop won the Ryder Cup for Europe * Ollie's tears * Rory McIlroy.

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