Humour Books

Book SynopsisFrom the all-star cast who brought you The Seven Deadly Virtues comes a book with a look at the good life… or the crazy-stressful-overwhelmed life… of a father. The Dadly Virtues is a tongue-in-cheek collection of encouragement and guidance for any stage of fatherhood, from pacifying babies to prepping for senior prom, from cutting the cord to getting the first, “Best Grandpa” t-shirt. P.J. O’Rourke sets the stage with the chapter, “What Do Men Get from Fatherhood? Besides What They Put In …” and then is followed by: •Matthew Continetti’s, “Newborn Terror: The Moment You Realize that ‘Bundle of Joy’ Is a Euphemism for Something Very Different.” •Stephen F. Hayes’ “Siblings: The Best Gift You’ll Ever Give Your Kids.” •Jonah Goldberg’s “Get Your Kid a Dog: The Moral Case for Pets.” •Tucker Carlson’s “In Praise of Adventure: How to Fill a Child’s Life with Excitement and Danger (without Getting Them Killed).” •Michael Graham’s, “Dating: Enjoy the Movie and Please Keep the Impregnation to a Minimum.” •Christopher Caldwell’s “College: It’s Not as Bad as You Think; It’s Worse.” •Andrew Ferguson’s “Emerging Adults and Empty Nesters: Just When You Had Fatherhood All Figured Out.” •Toby Young’s “The Dark Side: Bad Parenting and the Things We Think, but Do Not Say.” •Joseph Epstein’s “Thanks, Grandpa: Grandfatherhood and the Spirit of the Age.” •And more. Father-to-be, two-time-dad, or granddad, each essay will make you laugh and, at the same time, reinforce your commitment to the virtuous—the dadly—life.Trade Review“To their kids, all fathers must eventually seem conservative. And old-fashioned, and perhaps even boring. But, politically speaking, is there a uniquely conservative way to be a dad? Weekly Standard senior writer Jonathan V. Last has edited an essay collection by 17 conservative writers, policy wonks and entertainers, all offering advice and reflections on the business of fatherhood.” — Carlos Lozada, Washington Post (May 7, 2015) “The book is a compilation of stories about fatherhood and is a refreshing change over all the books out there written from women’s perspective of parenting.” —Dr. Helen Smith, PJ Media (March 15, 2015 “Some of the country’s most highly-respected conservative journalists and opinion makers have come together and penned a new book. While these journalists are best known for their writings on political matters, this new book's subject is far more important. Parenting. More specifically, fatherhood.” — Dan Joseph, MRC TV (May 7, 2015)In the Fraternity of Dad, children haze their sires, who become men. Maybe. With one exception, each of the contributors to The Dadly Virtues is a member of the Frat of Dad and has stories about what he learned, what he wishes he’d known, and what he still doesn’t know. The book is arranged chronologically, from new fathers to grandfathers, but you should start with the final essay, Joseph Epstein’s reflections on being a single father and then helping raise his grandchildren. Amongst the frat, Epstein is the man, a mensch, the incredibly cool alumnus everybody wants to be—or at least write as well as. —Mike Hubbard, Ricochet“The Dadly Virtues takes a tongue-in-cheek approach to a subject with serious societal ramifications. It arrives at a time when fathers, and men in general, are often portrayed as bumbling and clueless—and, as Last notes in his introduction, ‘only 69 percent of kids (in America) live in a home with two parents.’ It contains some language that’s probably best not shared with younger children.” “The book covers all stages of fatherhood: expecting and experiencing a first child’s birth; seeing one’s family expand; dealing with children about religion, athletics, college, dating, marriage, and moving out on their own or back home; and eventually becoming a grandfather.” “The readers who might benefit most from the book are those about to be fathers. Describing it as ‘part instructional guide, part meditation, part war journal,’ Last writes: ‘It is, frankly, the book I wish I’d had back when my first child, Cody, was born.’” —Alan Wallace, TribLive “In the best-selling 2014 book The Seven Deadly Virtues, editor Jonathan V. Last makes a case for gratitude as the best of the virtues, surpassing justice, curiosity, prudence, and all others.” —Marty Wiggins, Tyler Morning Telegraph “What author Jonathan Last has assembled here is a distillation of what it means to be a father, told through the stories of fathers who happen to be gifted writers, as well as being absolutely hilarious. Each chapter has its share of funny war stories, but each also has some deep insights into the ups and downs of raising kids. There is timeless wisdom in these comical stories. Plus, this book has an essay by Matt Labash who many claim is the funniest writer in America these days. But don’t be surprised if your eyes get misty at the closing chapter on becoming a good grandfather.” —Sue Randleman, Crossville Chroncile "In the new book The Dadly Virtues, fathers - from all walks of life and from all stages of family life - share their insights about what being a father means to them. And they do it with a liberal dose of irreverent humor. . . . Every journey needs a journal, and The Dadly Virtues is an excellent collection of journal entries about the fatherhood journey. The book makes you think, laugh and remember; you can’t ask for much more than that." —Wayne Parker, About.com“Depending on the author, the humor ranges from quiet dry wit to don’t-drink-your-coffee-while-reading-because-you-will-snort-coffee-through-your-nose funny. P. J. O’Rourke’s chapter on how fatherhood turns men into adults will make you chuckle. Tucker Carlson’s exploration on filling your children’s lives with excitement and danger will make you laugh. So will Toby Young’s on bad parenting, Andrew Ferguson’s on empty nests, Rob Long’s on marriage, and Joseph Epstein’s on being a grandparent.”“The chapters are not just about jokes. Each dispenses wisdom about some aspect of fatherhood. Any dad who had gone through “the Talk” on sex with their children will identify with the embarrassment experienced by Matt Labash. You may not be as into shared experiences in television watching with your children as James Lileks, but he reminds you of some shared experience with your children.”“Fathers who have been through the experiences related by the authors will nod in agreement. Fathers who have yet to go through some aspect of fatherhood outlined will get useful pointers. The Dadly Virtues is out in time for Father’s Day. It is a book with application past Father’s Day. This book is one that will resonate throughout the year.” —Mark Lardas, Galveston County Daily News (June 7, 2015)“What do you get when you assemble an all-star cast of writers who have collectively experienced the many terrors and triumphs of fatherhood and have lived to write about it? You end up with The Dadly Virtues: Adventures From the Worst Job You’ll Ever Love. As the subtitle suggests, this book is a tongue-in-cheek portrait of the gory glory of fatherhood, containing plenty of side-splitting anecdotes and cultural critique with a dash of philosophical profundity. The editor, Jonathan Last, likens the book to ‘something of a Swiss army knife: part instructional guide, part meditation, part war journal’ (4) … . As a recent inductee to the fraternity of fatherhood, I am personally weary of the many formulaic books I have seen that treat fatherhood as though it’s a science to be conquered. If you’re like me, you’ll agree that the unfiltered and personal nature of The Dadly Virtues is its greatest strength. Last and company portray fatherhood less like a science and more like an art form in which hapless amateurs creep toward mastery through a process of trial and error. With each chapter, you’ll be treated to a strikingly intimate and refreshingly witty take on the real-life rigors and joys of fatherhood… . The Dadly Virtues is a refreshing look at the time-worn institution of fatherhood. After reading it, those of you who aren’t dads will wonder if you should ever become one, while those of us who are will wonder why we didn’t start sooner. In the words of Last, ‘If you aren’t otherwise engaged in some duty that precludes it—say, the priesthood—and you have the opportunity, then you should be a father. There is nothing more vexing, exhausting, noble, or manly. It’s the worst job you’ll ever love’ (15)… . Often side-splitting, sometimes tear-jerking, and always riveting, The Dadly Virtues will resonate with any father or father-to-be.” — Timothy Kleiser, the Gospel CoalitionTable of ContentsAcknowledgments / xi Introduction: On Fatherhood, Manliness, and Failure / 3 Jonathan V. Last Chapter 1: What Do Men Get from Fatherhood? Besides What They Put In … / 17 P. J. O’Rourke Chapter 2: Newborn Terror: The Moment You Realize That “Bundle of Joy” Is a Euphemism for Something Very Different / 25 Matthew Continetti Chapter 3: Siblings: The Best Gift You’ll Ever Give Your Kids / 36 Stephen F. Hayes Chapter 4: Television and Kids: The Beauty and Pain of TV / 45 James Lileks Chapter 5: Get Your Kid a Dog: The Moral Case for Pets / 58 Jonah Goldberg Chapter 6: In Praise of Adventure: How to Fill a Child’s Life with Excitement and Danger (Without Getting Them Killed) / 66 Tucker Carlson Chapter 7: Catechesis: Teaching Your Kid about God / 73 Larry Miller Chapter 8: Surviving School: It’s Just as Bad the Second Time Around / 84 Joe Queenan Chapter 9: Sports: Advice for the Care and Feeding of the Child-Athlete / 94 David Burge (aka Iowahawk) Chapter 10: The Dark Side: Bad Parenting and the Things We Think, but Do Not Say / 104 Toby Young Chapter 11: The Talk: The Birds and Bees Aren’t What They Used to Be / 113 Matt Labash Chapter 12: Dating: Enjoy the Movie and Please Keep the Impregnation to a Minimum / 127 Michael Graham Chapter 13: College: It’s Not as Bad as You Think; It’s Worse / 137 Christopher Caldwell Chapter 14: Emerging Adults and Empty Nesters: Just When You Had Fatherhood All Figured Out / 146 Andrew Ferguson Chapter 15: Love and Marriage: How to Talk to Your Kids about the Most Important Decision They’ll Ever Make / 156 Rob Long Chapter 16: Thanks, Grandpa: Grandfatherhood and the Spirit of the Age / 166 Joseph Epstein About the Contributors / 177

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Book SynopsisAn all-star team of eighteen conservative writers offers a hilarious, insightful, sanctimony-free remix of William Bennett’s The Book of Virtues—without parental controls. The Seven Deadly Virtues sits down next to readers at the bar, buys them a drink, and an hour or three later, ushers them into the revival tent without them even realizing it. The book’s contributors include Sonny Bunch, Christopher Buckley, David “Iowahawk” Burge, Christopher Caldwell, Andrew Ferguson, Jonah Goldberg, Michael Graham, Mollie Hemingway, Rita Koganzon, Matt Labash, James Lileks, Rob Long, Larry Miller, P. J. O’Rourke, Joe Queenan, Christine Rosen, and Andrew Stiles. Jonathan V. Last, senior writer at the Weekly Standard, editor of the collection, is also a contributor. All eighteen essays in this book are appearing for the first time anywhere. In the book’s opening essay, P. J. O’Rourke observes: “Virtue has by no means disappeared. It’s as much in public view as ever. But it’s been strung up by the heels. Virtue is upside down. Virtue is uncomfortable. Virtue looks ridiculous. All the change and the house keys are falling out of Virtue’s pants pockets.” Here are the virtues everyone (including the book’s contributors) was taught in Sunday school but have totally forgotten about until this very moment. In this sanctimony-free zone: • Joe Queenan observes: “In essence, thrift is a virtue that resembles being very good at Mahjong. You’ve heard about people who can do it, but you’ve never actually met any of them.” • P. J. O’Rourke notes: “Fortitude is quaint. We praise the greatest generation for having it, but they had aluminum siding, church on Sunday, and jobs that required them to wear neckties or nylons (but never at the same time). We don’t want those either.” • Christine Rosen writes: “A fellowship grounded in sociality means enjoying the company of those with whom you actually share physical space rather than those with whom you regularly and enthusiastically exchange cat videos.” • Rob Long offers his version of modern day justice: if you sleep late on the weekend, you are forced to wait thirty minutes in line at Costco. • Jonah Goldberg offers: “There was a time when this desire-to-do-good-in-all-things was considered the only kind of integrity: ‘Angels are better than mortals. They’re always certain about what is right because, by definition, they’re doing God’s will.’ Gabriel knew when it was okay to remove a mattress tag and Sandalphon always tipped the correct amount.” • Sonny Bunch dissects forbearance, observing that the fictional Two Minutes Hate of George Orwell’s 1984 is now actually a reality directed at living, breathing people. Thanks, in part, to the Internet, “Its targets are designated by a spontaneously created mob—one that, due to its hive-mind nature—is virtually impossible to call off.” By the time readers have completed The Seven Deadly Virtues, they won’t even realize that they’ve just been catechized into an entirely different—and better—moral universe.Trade Review“[I]nteresting and thought provoking … endearing enough to make the reader charitably inclined.” —Wall Street Journal (11/05/2014)"The Seven Deadly Virtues is 202 readable pages written by a witty group of 18 peculiar moralists, and it deserves similar success. You just know that you are in for a treat when a book on the subject of virtue starts with P.J. O’Rourke and ends with Chris Buckley. In between them, you’ll discover the architects of a new conservative cool that shows that is possible to be moral without being moralistic and authoritative without being authoritarian." —The Washington Times (11/05/2014)“It is a light, easy read and worth the time spent for the chuckle, but don’t get the wrong idea. Students of ethics and philosophy will be pleased when Jonathan Last quotes heavyweight philosopher Alasdair MacIntyre (p. 9), Andrew Stiles references C. S. Lewis in his call for temperance, and other essayists remind us of the words of St. Paul, St. Augustine, and other towering figures in the history of Christianity. Overall, I would recommend this book to students because it’s rare to find a humorous contribution to the topic of virtue that is not tearing down morality, but instead gives compelling reasons why we should all strive to be better people.” —Kristin A. Vargas, Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary, The Christian LibrarianTable of ContentsAcknowledgments / xi Introduction: On Virtues, Past and Present / 3 By Jonathan V. Last Part I: The Cardinal Virtues Chapter 1: The Seven Deadly Virtues: And the New York Times / 17 By P. J. O’Rourke Chapter 2: Prudence: Long Live the Queen / 26 By Andrew Ferguson Chapter 3: Justice: The One Virtue Nobody Really Wants / 38 By Rob Long Chapter 4: Courage: The Rise of “Shelter in Place” America / 48 By Michael Graham Chapter 5: Temperance: The Deadliest Virtue / 58 By Andrew Stiles Chapter 6: Hope: Chicago Is a Place Called Hope / 66 By David Burge (aka Iowahawk) Chapter 7: Charity: You Can’t Give This Stuff Away / 74 By Mollie Hemingway Chapter 8: Faith: The Eleventh Commandment / 83 By Larry Miller Part II: The Everyday Virtues Chapter 9: Chastity: The Final Taboo / 95 By Matt Labash Chapter 10: Simplicity: Or, the Many-Splendored Virtues of Hoarding / 110 By James Lileks Chapter 11: Thrift: The Un-American Virtue / 121 By Joe Queenan Chapter 12: Honesty: It’s Absolutely the Best Policy (Sometimes) / 129 By Rita Koganzon Chapter 13: Fellowship: Reach Out and Touch Someone / 139 By Christine Rosen Chapter 14: Forbearance: Opting Out of the Politicized Life / 147 By Sonny Bunch Chapter 15: Integrity: Living by the Code of the Superman / 156 By Jonah Goldberg Chapter 16: Curiosity: Maybe the Cat Got What It Had Coming / 165 By Christopher Caldwell Chapter 17: Perseverance: All the Way to the End / 174 By Christopher Buckley Author Bios / 185

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Book SynopsisFrom the all-star cast who brought you The Seven Deadly Virtues comes a book with a look at the good life… or the crazy-stressful-overwhelmed life… of a father. The Dadly Virtues is a tongue-in-cheek collection of encouragement and guidance for any stage of fatherhood, from pacifying babies to prepping for senior prom, from cutting the cord to getting the first, “Best Grandpa” t-shirt. P.J. O’Rourke sets the stage with the chapter, “What Do Men Get from Fatherhood? Besides What They Put In …” and then is followed by: •Matthew Continetti’s, “Newborn Terror: The Moment You Realize that ‘Bundle of Joy’ Is a Euphemism for Something Very Different.” •Stephen F. Hayes’ “Siblings: The Best Gift You’ll Ever Give Your Kids.” •Jonah Goldberg’s “Get Your Kid a Dog: The Moral Case for Pets.” •Tucker Carlson’s “In Praise of Adventure: How to Fill a Child’s Life with Excitement and Danger (without Getting Them Killed).” •Michael Graham’s, “Dating: Enjoy the Movie and Please Keep the Impregnation to a Minimum.” •Christopher Caldwell’s “College: It’s Not as Bad as You Think; It’s Worse.” •Andrew Ferguson’s “Emerging Adults and Empty Nesters: Just When You Had Fatherhood All Figured Out.” •Toby Young’s “The Dark Side: Bad Parenting and the Things We Think, but Do Not Say.” •Joseph Epstein’s “Thanks, Grandpa: Grandfatherhood and the Spirit of the Age.” •And more. Father-to-be, two-time-dad, or granddad, each essay will make you laugh and, at the same time, reinforce your commitment to the virtuous—the dadly—life.Trade Review“To their kids, all fathers must eventually seem conservative. And old-fashioned, and perhaps even boring. But, politically speaking, is there a uniquely conservative way to be a dad? Weekly Standard senior writer Jonathan V. Last has edited an essay collection by 17 conservative writers, policy wonks and entertainers, all offering advice and reflections on the business of fatherhood.” — Carlos Lozada, Washington Post (May 7, 2015) “The book is a compilation of stories about fatherhood and is a refreshing change over all the books out there written from women’s perspective of parenting.” —Dr. Helen Smith, PJ Media (March 15, 2015 “Some of the country’s most highly-respected conservative journalists and opinion makers have come together and penned a new book. While these journalists are best known for their writings on political matters, this new book's subject is far more important. Parenting. More specifically, fatherhood.” — Dan Joseph, MRC TV (May 7, 2015)In the Fraternity of Dad, children haze their sires, who become men. Maybe. With one exception, each of the contributors to The Dadly Virtues is a member of the Frat of Dad and has stories about what he learned, what he wishes he’d known, and what he still doesn’t know. The book is arranged chronologically, from new fathers to grandfathers, but you should start with the final essay, Joseph Epstein’s reflections on being a single father and then helping raise his grandchildren. Amongst the frat, Epstein is the man, a mensch, the incredibly cool alumnus everybody wants to be—or at least write as well as. —Mike Hubbard, Ricochet“The Dadly Virtues takes a tongue-in-cheek approach to a subject with serious societal ramifications. It arrives at a time when fathers, and men in general, are often portrayed as bumbling and clueless—and, as Last notes in his introduction, ‘only 69 percent of kids (in America) live in a home with two parents.’ It contains some language that’s probably best not shared with younger children.” “The book covers all stages of fatherhood: expecting and experiencing a first child’s birth; seeing one’s family expand; dealing with children about religion, athletics, college, dating, marriage, and moving out on their own or back home; and eventually becoming a grandfather.” “The readers who might benefit most from the book are those about to be fathers. Describing it as ‘part instructional guide, part meditation, part war journal,’ Last writes: ‘It is, frankly, the book I wish I’d had back when my first child, Cody, was born.’” —Alan Wallace, TribLive “In the best-selling 2014 book The Seven Deadly Virtues, editor Jonathan V. Last makes a case for gratitude as the best of the virtues, surpassing justice, curiosity, prudence, and all others.” —Marty Wiggins, Tyler Morning Telegraph “What author Jonathan Last has assembled here is a distillation of what it means to be a father, told through the stories of fathers who happen to be gifted writers, as well as being absolutely hilarious. Each chapter has its share of funny war stories, but each also has some deep insights into the ups and downs of raising kids. There is timeless wisdom in these comical stories. Plus, this book has an essay by Matt Labash who many claim is the funniest writer in America these days. But don’t be surprised if your eyes get misty at the closing chapter on becoming a good grandfather.” —Sue Randleman, Crossville Chroncile "In the new book The Dadly Virtues, fathers - from all walks of life and from all stages of family life - share their insights about what being a father means to them. And they do it with a liberal dose of irreverent humor. . . . Every journey needs a journal, and The Dadly Virtues is an excellent collection of journal entries about the fatherhood journey. The book makes you think, laugh and remember; you can’t ask for much more than that." —Wayne Parker, About.com“Depending on the author, the humor ranges from quiet dry wit to don’t-drink-your-coffee-while-reading-because-you-will-snort-coffee-through-your-nose funny. P. J. O’Rourke’s chapter on how fatherhood turns men into adults will make you chuckle. Tucker Carlson’s exploration on filling your children’s lives with excitement and danger will make you laugh. So will Toby Young’s on bad parenting, Andrew Ferguson’s on empty nests, Rob Long’s on marriage, and Joseph Epstein’s on being a grandparent.”“The chapters are not just about jokes. Each dispenses wisdom about some aspect of fatherhood. Any dad who had gone through “the Talk” on sex with their children will identify with the embarrassment experienced by Matt Labash. You may not be as into shared experiences in television watching with your children as James Lileks, but he reminds you of some shared experience with your children.”“Fathers who have been through the experiences related by the authors will nod in agreement. Fathers who have yet to go through some aspect of fatherhood outlined will get useful pointers. The Dadly Virtues is out in time for Father’s Day. It is a book with application past Father’s Day. This book is one that will resonate throughout the year.” —Mark Lardas, Galveston County Daily News (June 7, 2015)“What do you get when you assemble an all-star cast of writers who have collectively experienced the many terrors and triumphs of fatherhood and have lived to write about it? You end up with The Dadly Virtues: Adventures From the Worst Job You’ll Ever Love. As the subtitle suggests, this book is a tongue-in-cheek portrait of the gory glory of fatherhood, containing plenty of side-splitting anecdotes and cultural critique with a dash of philosophical profundity. The editor, Jonathan Last, likens the book to ‘something of a Swiss army knife: part instructional guide, part meditation, part war journal’ (4) … . As a recent inductee to the fraternity of fatherhood, I am personally weary of the many formulaic books I have seen that treat fatherhood as though it’s a science to be conquered. If you’re like me, you’ll agree that the unfiltered and personal nature of The Dadly Virtues is its greatest strength. Last and company portray fatherhood less like a science and more like an art form in which hapless amateurs creep toward mastery through a process of trial and error. With each chapter, you’ll be treated to a strikingly intimate and refreshingly witty take on the real-life rigors and joys of fatherhood… . The Dadly Virtues is a refreshing look at the time-worn institution of fatherhood. After reading it, those of you who aren’t dads will wonder if you should ever become one, while those of us who are will wonder why we didn’t start sooner. In the words of Last, ‘If you aren’t otherwise engaged in some duty that precludes it—say, the priesthood—and you have the opportunity, then you should be a father. There is nothing more vexing, exhausting, noble, or manly. It’s the worst job you’ll ever love’ (15)… . Often side-splitting, sometimes tear-jerking, and always riveting, The Dadly Virtues will resonate with any father or father-to-be.” — Timothy Kleiser, the Gospel CoalitionTable of ContentsAcknowledgments / xi Introduction: On Fatherhood, Manliness, and Failure / 3 Jonathan V. Last Chapter 1: What Do Men Get from Fatherhood? Besides What They Put In … / 17 P. J. O’Rourke Chapter 2: Newborn Terror: The Moment You Realize That “Bundle of Joy” Is a Euphemism for Something Very Different / 25 Matthew Continetti Chapter 3: Siblings: The Best Gift You’ll Ever Give Your Kids / 36 Stephen F. Hayes Chapter 4: Television and Kids: The Beauty and Pain of TV / 45 James Lileks Chapter 5: Get Your Kid a Dog: The Moral Case for Pets / 58 Jonah Goldberg Chapter 6: In Praise of Adventure: How to Fill a Child’s Life with Excitement and Danger (Without Getting Them Killed) / 66 Tucker Carlson Chapter 7: Catechesis: Teaching Your Kid about God / 73 Larry Miller Chapter 8: Surviving School: It’s Just as Bad the Second Time Around / 84 Joe Queenan Chapter 9: Sports: Advice for the Care and Feeding of the Child-Athlete / 94 David Burge (aka Iowahawk) Chapter 10: The Dark Side: Bad Parenting and the Things We Think, but Do Not Say / 104 Toby Young Chapter 11: The Talk: The Birds and Bees Aren’t What They Used to Be / 113 Matt Labash Chapter 12: Dating: Enjoy the Movie and Please Keep the Impregnation to a Minimum / 127 Michael Graham Chapter 13: College: It’s Not as Bad as You Think; It’s Worse / 137 Christopher Caldwell Chapter 14: Emerging Adults and Empty Nesters: Just When You Had Fatherhood All Figured Out / 146 Andrew Ferguson Chapter 15: Love and Marriage: How to Talk to Your Kids about the Most Important Decision They’ll Ever Make / 156 Rob Long Chapter 16: Thanks, Grandpa: Grandfatherhood and the Spirit of the Age / 166 Joseph Epstein About the Contributors / 177

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Book SynopsisFrom the all-star cast that brought you The Seven Deadly Virtues and The Dadly Virtues comes the ultimate Christmas survival guide: The Christmas Virtues. The Christmas season is a minefield of terrors: The family get-togethers with weird uncles, the sloppy office parties, the annoying 10-page Look-at-Us holiday letters—and we haven’t even mentioned the Black Friday mobs and that wretched Alvin and the Chipmunks song that plays every 90 minutes on Pandora, whether you like it or not. Rum-pah-pah-pum. And don’t forget the PC police lurking around every corner looking to beat the last bits of joy and comradery out of our society. Merry Christmas? Really? But it doesn’t have to be this way. 'Tis the season to recapture the wonder of Christmas, in our hearts and in our homes and even out in the public square. The Christmas Virtues is a humorous companion for, and guide to, navigating the trials and tribulations of the holiday season. It’s a reminder of how we can embrace the joy, hope, and love of Christmas—of the real Christmas. And a call for us to stand up for Christmas because America needs it now, more than ever. So sit back and enjoy the following tales by your favorite authors: Rob Long’s "The Christmas Spirit: In Defense of Ebenezer Scrooge.” P. J. O’Rourke’s “The Commercialization of Christmas: God Moves (The Merchandise) in a Mysterious Way.” Andrew Ferguson’s “Jingle Bell Rock: Taking the Christ Out of Christmas Songs” Matt Labash’s “Home for the Holidays: The Trials and Tribulations of Family.” Stephen F. Hayes’ "here Comes Santa Claus: The Wonder of Christmas Morning." Toby Young’s “The ghosts of Christmas: Holidays Past and Present” Jonah Goldberg’s “The War on Christmas: It’s Real, and It’s Spectacular.” Christopher Buckley’s “Saint Joseph: The Forgotten ‘Father Christmas.’” Kirsten Powers’ “The first Noel: Christmas with Jesus.” James Lileks' "Boxing Day and the Christmas Hangover." And More Trade ReviewJonathan Last has provided an entertaining break to the holiday season in The Christmas Virtues: A Treasury of Conservative Tales for the Holidays… . The virtues part of The Christmas Virtues is often subtle, but through the stories and the prose, the reader can find a reminder of what really matters during the holiday season and what kinds of things we should just look past. Fighting the creeping commercialization and secularization of Christmas is the underlying theme of all of the essays, along with the need to come back to the basics of love, charity and the message of the Prince of Peace. We could all do a little better to not take ourselves so seriously during the holidays and focus more on the important parts.” —Wayne Parker, About Parenting“Here’s the thing. Not everything about the holiday season is wonderful and filled with cheer. We all know that. So, why sugarcoat it all? This all-star cast of writers got together, and rather than a Chicken Soup for the Soul type of book, has put together a compilation that truly hits the nail on the head about the holiday season.”“P.J. O’Rourke talks about the commercialization of Christmas, Joe Quennan shares his take on the artful tradition of Christmas cards. Matt Labash makes light of the antics of holiday family gatherings. But, don’t expect a bunch of funny, lighthearted stories that will keep you laughing, as some are serious and other will share a perspective you probably have never looked at Christmas from.”“I highly, highly recommend! 5 stars!”—Mommy Rantings Blog“This book is sure to be loved by anyone who embodies the season of Christmas – you undoubtedly know a few of these people. These friends and family members can be hard to gift-shop for, but consider this book your solution. Not only will you be giving them a humorous, enjoyable read, but you will be giving them memories and stories to keep them warm for many Christmas seasons to come.” —Jacqueline Isaacs, Conservative Book ClubTable of ContentsIntroduction The Miracle of Christmas / 3Jonathan V. Last Chapter 1: The Christmas Spirit In Defense of Ebenezer Scrooge / 15Rob LongChapter 2: The Commercialization of Christmas God Moves (the Merchandise) in a Mysterious Way / 23P. J. O’RourkeChapter 3: Season’s Greetings! Ten Simple Rules for Sending Christmas Cards / 33Joe QueenanChapter 4: Jingle Bell Rock Taking the Christ Out of Christmas Songs / 45Andrew FergusonChapter 5: Oh, Tannenbaum A Tradition Unlike Any Other / 54Christopher CaldwellChapter 6: The Nativity Stories The Best (and Worst) Christmas Movies Ever / 62Sonny BunchChapter 7: Home for the Holidays The Trials and Tribulations of Family / 70Matt LabashChapter 8: Saint Nicholas: Friend or Foe? A Document Dump from Santa’s Secret Email Server / 83David “Iowahawk” BurgeChapter 9: All Good Gifts Tickle Me Elmo and the Madness of Christmas Toys / 99Heather WilhelmChapter 10: Here Comes Santa Claus The Wonder of Christmas Morning / 108Stephen F. HayesChapter 11: The Ghosts of Christmas Holidays Past and Present / 117Toby YoungChapter 12: The War on Christmas It’s Real, and It’s Spectacular / 125Jonah GoldbergChapter 13: Jews Who Love Christmas We All Love Christmas Magic / 135Larry MillerChapter 14: I’m Dreaming of a Jewish Christmas Celebrating a Day You Don’t Really Share / 146Joseph EpsteinChapter 15: The Greatest of These Is Hope The Impossible Promises of Christmas / 155Michael GrahamChapter 16: Saint Joseph The Forgotten “Father Christmas” / 163Christopher BuckleyChapter 17: Mary, Mother of All The Real Miracles of the Virgin Birth Aren’t What You Think / 171Mollie HemingwayChapter 18: The First Noel Christmas with Jesus / 180Kirsten PowersChapter 19: The Day After The Illusion of Returning to Normal / 189James LileksAbout the Contributors / 199

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Book SynopsisF is for fun and L is for laughs in this rollicking romp through the alphabet poking good natured fun at Washington politics and politicians. The book takes unerring aim at the foibles and frailties of the political class and their inside-the-beltway blustering. With illustrations provided by award-winning artist Mark Anderson and verses and text written by Washington Post political writer Dana Milbank, this is political satire at its best. O is for Obama is a witty, non-partisan, and equal-opportunity ribbing of not just out-of-touch politicians, but also of greedy businessmen, tone-deaf bureaucrats, and ivory-tower elites that no frustrated voter fed up with Washington will want to be without.

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Book SynopsisStick this bestselling shopping list notepad on your fridge and check off depleted items as you run out, then replenish with ease and certainty when next you shop. 6 x 9-inch, 60 sheet notepad with magnet on back. Who hasn’t wandered blindly at the grocery store, trying to remember what to buy? A great gift for any head of household Never forget the milk again with the perfect grocery list pad

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Book SynopsisThis hilarious and whimsical Chinese langauge book shows all the slang words that have entered the Chinese lexicon in the last few years. This compendium of hip, contemporary buzz words will amuse and delight those who want to know what people are talking about in China now. The book arose from a weekly column in the Shanghai Daily newspaper that introduced new Chinese words an slang. This compilation contains all the terms and phrases published in the "Buzzwords" column for the past four years. Each term is presented first in Chinese and then in pinyin. Then it's followed by its English translation and a short paragraph to explain its basic meaning and usage.

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Book Synopsis"So You Think You Can Be President? is required reading not just for those of us who have had the audacity to ask ourselves that question, but for everyone."—Senator John Kerry What exactly does the leader of five legislative branches, ten executive branches, twenty departments, ninety-five independent agencies, and the free world do at his (or her) job every day? More importantly, what should the President of the United States (POTUS) know before she or he is elected? Have you ever thought, "I could do a better job than that bum in the White House"? Iris Burnett and Clay Greager have devised a hilarious test to see if you (yes, you) are qualified to be the next President of the United States. Tackling everything from your incredibly personal details (can you account for every penny you have ever made?) to your stance on hard-hitting issues like immigration, defense, and how many of your rich friends are going to get jobs they are totally unqualified for, So You Think You Can Be President? is a witty and uproarious send-up of our political process.

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Book SynopsisIf Hollywood is a sport, you want Leslie Gornstein on your team and this playbook in your ridiculously-oversized leather purse. The A-List Playbook is the perfect introduction for newcomers to the exciting alternate reality of the celebrity lifestyle. A must-read for anyone who cares why so many celebs are sporting "bumps," or whether they are really "just like us," this guide—nay, rulebook—lays down the law on what you need to know to play Hollywood in a simple and concise manner. (And if you don't care? You care. It's a celebrity culture; if you can't embrace it, mock it!)The voice is intelligently hilarious, and everyone's favorite Answer Bitch has been around the boulevard once or twice. (How else would she have scored a column on E! and a radio show on Sirius?) For the first time on the written page, she reveals the secrets to celebrity life. Here's everything you need to know to hire and fire assistants, develop a loyal entourage, get free makeup, and keep those inaccurate cellulite-inclusive photographs out of the press. With timeless anecdotes, razor sharp quotes, and illustrative charts, The A-List Playbook is the smart girl's response to People.

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Book SynopsisAny angler who has ever been out-fished by a beginner with a twig and some twine or questioned whether bass are smarter than he is will be in good company here. Hilarious Fishing Cartoons pokes fun at every kind of angling absurdity. Tiers struggling to tie microscopic flies, bass fishermen who catch more boots than bass, weekenders loaded down with every gizmo and piece of tackle in the shop, and fanatical, freezing ice fishermen doomed to drill and not grill are all represented. Troy's pen is deft and clever, and his one-liners are truly side-splitting. The next time your line gets so tangled you're ready to curse or quit fishing forever, remember these cartoons and you may just find yourself chuckling instead.

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Book SynopsisFrom professional athletes like Tiger Woods and Michael Jordan to philosophers like Confucius, inspirational business books love to suggest that readers can succeed in business and in life by adopting the traits of their famous subjects. In Z.E.O. by Scott Kenemore, frustrated employees will finally find inspiration in a source they can already relate to: zombies! A guide for any Joe-lunchbox or aspiring-C.E.O., Z.E.O. illustrates how the lessons learned from zombies and zombie films can be applied—from the typing-pool to the boardroom—to further a professional career, increase personal and corporate wealth, and harness the tools to personal success. Taking up where other business and personal finance books leave off, Z.E.O. provides nuts-and-bolts instructions for taking the inspirational aspects of zombies and adopting them to maximize your own personal effectiveness. Sure, you might have to knock a few heads—and eat a few brains—along the way, but that doesn’t stop a zombie. Why should it stop you?

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Book SynopsisWomen daring and lucky enough to discover romance with a vampire claim to enjoy the most intense love and sex of their lives. But how do you find a vampire of your very own? And just how do you get him interested in ravishing you within an inch of your life? Will the ecstasy of the coupling be worth the inherent risks of vampire love—the risks of drinking your blood, the risks of secrecy, and the risks of betrayal? At last, this step-by-step guide will help women the world over to experience the pleasures of vampire romance. You’ll learn why these creatures make the best lovers (stamina, overpowering strength, and deep appreciation of women) and the best places to find a vampire and, no, it’s not in graveyards. Once you’ve been initiated into the realm of human-vampire sex, you’ll want to know about vampire turn-ons, games vampires play, dealing with jealousy, and finally, whether or not to consider becoming a vampire yourself. Author and vampire Luc Richard Ballion reveals his tricks on balancing blood-play with physical thrills, and includes true descriptions of trysts across the ages, compatibility checklists, and an A-to-Z of troubleshooting. The result is a book you would die for. Really.

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Book SynopsisPhil Villarreal is not a Harvard MBA or a professional financial advisor or a talking head on a cable television network focusing on business, but he can change your financial life—if you are willing to move into the gray areas of money and ethics. His advice is as funny as it is useful as it is a little bit evil. Instead of playing straight and saving money by cutting back on things you need or want, Secrets of a Stingy Scoundrel has a better plan to save money by working the system and sticking it to “the man.” Here’s how to get free Internet service, never pay for ketchup and plastic straws, get refunds on already opened DVDs, clothe yourself using free swag from credit card promotions, benefit from the bonanza that is the garbage thrown out by college kids, how to get in free to sporting events, score free on-demand movies in hotels, and more! Hilarious, tongue-in-cheek, and sardonically practical, this is the book for everyone who loves rule-bending, loophole-exploiting, money-saving madness. In this economy, it’s every man for himself and dog-eat-dog—and this book can help.

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Book SynopsisSun Tzu meets George Romero in Scott Kenemore’s third zombie book. 40 color illustrations

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Book SynopsisSure, everyone gets sick sometimes, but do you realize that plenty of those folks also die slow, unpleasant deaths from diseases that stumped even the experts at top-notch (still privately run) hospitals? That’s right: There are plenty of illnesses that even physicians have never heard about. Nodding Disease, Alice in Wonderland Syndrome, and Cutaneous Horn (yes, you grow a horn) are all featured here in pithy, energetic entries. You won’t have to worry about socialized medicine if you have this book—even if your doc could see you within a month, you might die due to his ignorance. Lucky for you and your loved ones, Ian Landau (who has no medical training but is a hell of a researcher) includes: Descriptions of each disease Background and history How to diagnose yourself and others Suggested treatments Prevention methods The book is not for the faint of heart, as it probably could cause cardiac arrest. (And you ain’t coming back from that without Ian’s help.)

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Book SynopsisJohnny Boo goes on a boring adventure, falls to the bottom of an ice cream hole, and has a maybe-birthday celebration.

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Book SynopsisLiz Prince, author of the world''s cutest relationship comic, "Will You Still Love Me If I Wet the Bed?", returns with a new comic about being — gasp! — SINGLE. Finally bringing her popular webcomic to printed form, Alone Forever explores the joys of flying solo, free to focus on what really matters: comics, punk rock, and cute boys with beards. Drawn in Liz Prince''s ultra-charming style, filled with self-deprecation and cats, there''s something for everyone to relate to in this celebration of self-reliance in the age of OkCupid.

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Book SynopsisThis wordless collection of strips by renowned artist/designer Rian Hughes reveals the lighter side of our obsession with social rankings.When everyone has a number, everyone knows their place. Lower numbers are better, higher numbers are less important, and that''s just the way it is. But what if that number could change? You might try to buck the system and assert your individuality... or you might end up with a big fat zero.Big questions are explored and unexpected answers found in the first solo comics collection from award-winning designer & illustrator Rian Hughes. His whimsical, witty, and insightful strips will make you both smile and consider. Where do you stand in the pecking order? Is your number up? 2018 Pubwest Design Awards - Gold Winner for Graphic Album, New Material

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Book SynopsisIn Thing I Learned From Knitting (Whether I Wanted to or Not), Pearl Mc-Phee examines age-old aphorisms in light of knitting. From "Hope Springs Eternal" to "A Friend in Need is a Friend Indeed" and "Birds of a Feather Flock Together", Pearl=McPhee casts a fresh, off-beat light on these sayings. Presented in quick, punchy takes, each entry in this book calls out to be read aloud and shared with anyone who enjoys playing with yarn and needles. Pearl-McPhee's observations are hilarious; the situations she describes strike a familiar "not you, too?" feeling in the heart of anyone who knits. Interspersed throughout the book are her notes on the things that "Knitting is still trying to teach me..." That no matter how well you knit, looking at your work too closely isn't helpful. It's like kissing with your eyes open. Nobody looks good that close up.

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Book SynopsisSee the Enterprise. See the Enterprise go boldly. Go Go Go, Enterprise! Go Boldly! Join Kirk and Spock as they go boldly where no parody has gone before! This Prime Directive primer steps through The Guardian of Forever to a simpler time of reading, writing, and red shirts. From the mind of New York Times bestselling pop culturalist Robb Pearlman, Fun with Kirk and Spock will help cadets of all ages master the art of reading as their favorite Starfleet officers, Klingons, Romulans, Andorians, and Gorn beam down into exciting adventures.Trade Review“Are you ready for a fun Star Trek book? One that's ideal for both longtime adult fans and kids, too? Then, get ready to beam up Fun with Kirk and Spock.” — StarTrek.com “Even Spock would let slip a smile at this dead-pan narration.” — The Washington Post “Candidate for Best Trek Book Ever? I think so.” – New York Times bestselling author Dayton Ward -- Robb Pearlman * Fun with Kirk and Spock *"Pearlman nails it." -- Maria Sciullo, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette“A quirky and hilarious parody!” -- BookPage.com“Quite simply the funniest and most authentic send-up of Trek I have seen… ever!” -- TrekMovie.com

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Book SynopsisFilled with more facts than a clickbait article and more authentic than the Kardashians, this handbook is a Millennial's first line of defense against naysayers, Baby Boomers, and politicians.Millennials are killing everything: marriage, the economy, the environment. Or was that the Baby Boomers? Filled with more facts than a clickbait article and more authentic than the Kardashians, this handbook is a Millennial's first line of defense against the naysayers. Hold your own in your next Twitter fight or show your Aunt Linda what it means to be woke with facts about the housing market, marriage, and even politics. This manifesto is packed full of sarcasm, satire, and statistics about America's most self-centered generations.

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Book SynopsisLaugh with dads, not at them, with over 160 hilarious knee-slappers and puns dads love to tell!A potato walks into a bar. All eyes were on him.This is just one example of the 200 hilariously hokey knee-slappers and puns in World's Greatest Dad Jokes. Tired of the same humdrum ill-fitting pants jokes, or jabs about turkeys being flightless birds? This perfect Father’s Day, Christmas or anytime gift will keep the dads in your life on the pulse of family-friendly corny humor that is all new and exclusive to this book. With this comically exhaustive resource on hand, everyone will be laughing with dads, not at them!

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Book SynopsisWe love our moms, but sometimes they make for the perfect comedy.From awkward questions to nagging phone calls, sometimes a mother''s love can be smothering. Laugh along with some of mom''s greatest follies, from the times she wants to set you up on a date with a doctor to checking to making sure you''ve eaten. The perfect gift for stressed out siblings and good-humored mothers alike, this book will have you in stitches. The latest edition in the Curio series, this pocket-sized book is perfect for laughter on the go.

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Book SynopsisAre you ready to #RateASpecies? Zoos and aquariums have poked wild fun at their animal friends—and their “product reviews” will leave your pack howling! Packed with adorable animal photos and laced with wit and humor, Animals Reviewed is a must-read for animal lovers of all ages. All proceeds benefit the Association of Zoos and Aquarium’s mission to advance animal welfare, public engagement, and conservation.

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Book SynopsisIt was none other than Langston Hughes who called Oliver Wendell Harrington America's greatest black cartoonist.Yet largely because he chose to live as an expatriate far from the American mainstream, he has been almost entirely overlooked by contemporary historians and scholars of African American culture.Born in 1912 and a graduate of the Yale School of Fine Arts, he was a prolific contributor of humorous and editorial cartoons to the black press in the 1930s and 1940s, but he achieved fame for his creation of a cartoon panel called Dark Laughter, a satire of Harlem society and featuring Bootsie, a character in the tradition of the wise fool. Bootsie became widely known and loved wherever black newspapers appeared.For airing strong anti-racist views, Harrington was targeted during the McCarthy era. And in 1951, he was self-exiled in Paris. In 1961, he found himself trapped behind the Berlin Wall. But, he chose to remain in East Germany. His powerful political cartoons were published in East German magazines and in the American Communist newspaper The Daily World. He became a favorite among students and intellectuals in the Eastern Bloc. In America he was mainly forgotten.Here, selected from the Walter O. Evans Collection of African-American Art, is an omnibus of Harrington's best cartoons from the past four decades. It highlights his exceptional talent, his potent impact with editorial comment and social criticism, and his deserving of acclaim in his native land.

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Book SynopsisIn this seventh volume, we see the changes in tone that now characterize Funky Winkerbean. Funky becomes more of a reality-based comic strip that depicts contemporary issues in a thought-provokingand sensitive manner. In 1992 Tom Batiuk did something even more radical: he rebooted and restructured the strip, establishing that the characters had graduated from high school. From then on the series progresses in real time.Funky Winkerbean placed Batiuk at the forefront of a new genre in comic art history. His bold characterizations and dramatic plots are engaging for his readers—teens, parents, and educators alike—because they are universal stories that people can identify with. Realizing there are many comic strips for readers interested in a fantasy world, Batiuk provides an alternative by creating stories that are powerful, real, and inspiring.“My job is to present stories that will interest and engage readers,” he says. “In doing so, I try to make the humor authentic and natural so that my characters are reacting just as the reader might. I think that mixing humor with serious and real themes heightens the readers’ interest.” Following his own muse has roused a fervent following for Batiuk. Funky has “become an untouchable comic strip,” even if its creator “does do work that’s different from the other comics on the comics page,” said Brendan Burford, general manager, syndication, at King Features.Trade Review“Comic strips are, in my opinion, short editorials on our lives. So thank you for your daily efforts to observe daily living.” - David M. Hutchings, Denver, Colorado.“I’ve enjoyed Funky Winkerbean for so many decades I’ve lost count. I first remember being drawn into it during the story line when an early Les Moorewas getting into emotional trouble for using his reallife relationship experience as fodder for his fiction. Iidentified!” - Richard Rockman, Hazleton, Pennsylvania.“Sometimes you just outdo yourself!” - Carolyn Schuldt, Peoria, Illinois.

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Book SynopsisFollow award-winning cartoonist Tom Batiuk as he chronicles Funky's evolution from gags to situational humor to behavioral humor In this eighth volume, Funky Winkerbean continues to move forward in real time, tackling issues of relevance and substance with characters whose lives are increasingly fateful and destined. Funky has placed Batiuk at the forefront of a new genre in comic art history as the strip pursues stories ahead of their time: guns in schools and teen suicide. The humor in Funky continues to grow as it evolves from sitcom gags to a deeper and more engaging behavioral style of humor.Trade Review“There are laughs to be had, but they are just one element of a recipe that delivers one short story after another about people just trying to make it from day to day.” — Brian Steinberg, Variety

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Book SynopsisBalancing humor with sensitivity to tell stories we need to hear .Funky Winkerbean, a newspaper staple since 1972, is one of the few comic strips that allows its characters to grow and age. With this ninth volume of the collected Funky Winkerbean, containing strips from 1996–1998, time continues to pass and events take place that will forever alter the lives of the core characters, even as new characters take the stage with stories to tell.Tom Batiuk's narrative humor style now grows to encompass such diverse events as retirement, weddings, the treatment of immigrants, dating abuse, and post office bombings. Some of the stories can be told over a cup of coffee, while others require a full-on Roman feast. As the stories become more universal, the humor in Funky continues to become an integral part of the ongoing narrative.

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Book SynopsisSince its newspaper debut in 1972, the comic strip Funky Winkerbean has chronicled the journey through life of a group of students from the fictitious West View High School. This twelfth volume presents strips from 2005, 2006, and 2007.Mixing humor with serious, real-life issues, this volume of The Complete Funky Winkerbean demonstrates that comics that entertain us can also help us comprehend and navigate life's most difficult challenges.This volume includes the story arc dealing with Lisa Moore's heartbreaking battle with breast cancer, which became a finalist in the cartooning category of the 2008 Pulitzer Prizes. Other stories include Lisa defending comic shop owner John Howard in an obscenity lawsuit, Wally's struggles with PTSD upon returning from the war in Afghanistan, and his return to Afghanistan with his wife Becky as part of a project to clear landmines. Marriages, graduations, births, and even the building of a new school all weave around and through Lisa's story.

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Book SynopsisThe characters of the Funky cartoon universe deal with the challenges of middle age This latest installment of The Complete Funky Winkerbean presents the comic strips from 2008, 2009, and 2010 and ushers the original Funky characters into middle age. In true Funky fashion, the characters have to grapple with very serious issues: nearly fatal car crashes, a war abroad, and a tanking economy at home. These years also mark the first appearance of Cayla, and her arrival on the scene is where cartoonist Tom Batiuk's new time-jump era begins to coalesce and take on its unique identity.

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