Search results for ""author clive whichelow""

The future is ours - let's enjoy it! This hilarious fully illustrated book will help ease you into this strange and perplexing new stage of your life.After all those years of routine you're suddenly free! You're bound to be a bit nervous - it is your first time. No more being bossed about - well, apart from by your other half, of course. No more getting up at the crack of dawn to go to work - though at your age you may have to get up at the crack of dawn anyway to use the loo. No more wage slavery - er, no more wages...But it's going to be fine, because you can now do what you want to do - within reason, naturally. Within these pages you'll discover:- What your new job as "retiree" involves, the hours (all of them) and the pay (let's face it, if anyone advertised a job with this salary, no one would take it)- Conversations you will no longer have to have- Things you no longer have to feel guilty about- Pursuits for bored retirees- Truths that will slowly dawn on you- Ways to supplement your pension...and all the other perks (and niggles) that come with your new position (and no, we don't mean "horizontal on the sofa").

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The grandchildren.It's one of the few phrases guaranteed to fill you with both delight and dread - the grandchildren are coming! Of course you love to see them, but what do you do with them for the next few hours - or even days?Thankfully, this book is here to guide you through. Choose from a whole host of delights:- Games old and new- Magic tricks that even you won't be able to mess up- Jokes that will make you the first sit-down stand-up comedianThe hours will fly by and, with any luck, you'll have just as much fun as they do!

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Finally, you’re a proper grown-up! But between the paunch and the mortgage, you’re starting to wonder if this is what you really want. You need midlife crisis survival skills: Stop calling it a midlife crisis and start calling it Teenagehood part 2. Do go to the gym occasionally. Don’t train to join the Olympic weightlifting team. This mischievous little book will help you enjoy your second youth with tongue-in-cheek advice and cheeky illustrations.

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Wrinklies Bedside Companion contains everything that the greying generation needs to know about the world, and quite a lot that they don't. Specially designed to live on your bedside table, or wherever you prefer to nap, and to provide light relief before sleep, be a source of interesting quotes and facts for insomniac Wrinklies or serve as a one-stop quote shop for all things that those of you with plenty of life experience will find amusing. Full of short, jokey pieces looking at various aspects of life from a Wrinklies' point of view. These pieces are quirky, satirical, imaginative and above all very funny. They are of course specially designed to appeal to the older reader by tapping into their interests, attitudes, opinions, experience, health problems and the like.

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You know you're having a midlife crisis when... ... all your clothes are made of leather - including your pyjamas. Have you taken a sudden liking to bodycon clothing that's three sizes too small? Are you considering a sexier upgrade to your car or even your partner? Try not to panic: it's only a midlife crisis. And besides, attempting to recapture your youth can be a lot of fun! Who said there's anything wrong with growing old disgracefully?

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Growing older doesn't mean you have to grow up! If you're the sort of golden oldie who still likes to party hard, chats up strangers in bars, listens to loud music (and not because your hearing is going), or dresses so outrageously that your grandchildren beg you to 'tone it down', then this book is for you. Full of irreverent advice on how to misbehave and put the younger generation to shame, Wrinklies Growing Old Disgracefully is a hilarious celebration of mis-spent seniority, written by two successful comedy sketch writers.

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You may never now become a rock star or regain the waist size you had at 18. You have taken a sudden interest in bleeding your radiators and figuring out the best route by road to anywhere in the country.On the bright side, you can feel smug that you have better grammar than a university student and don't have to dig out your embarrassing passport photo to get into pubs or buy alcohol.

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See the funny side of ageing with this collection of amusing observations, silly suggestions and humorous illustrations – the perfect gift for any birthday girl or boy with more than a few candles on their cake So you’re a little bit older. So what? Just because you’re getting on a bit doesn’t mean you have to start acting ancient. The universe is over 13 billion years old, and you’re probably nowhere near that yet – well, not quite anyway. Frankly, it’s never too early to start enjoying your second childhood, to stop taking life so seriously and to start acting a bit silly again. This book will be your go-to guide for inspiration and merriment while clocking up birthdays like they’re going out of fashion. Across these pages, you’ll find all kinds of wild recommendations and questionable advice, including: Things it’s never too late to do Grown-up and less grown-up ways to behave at work How to keep up with modern technology Ways you can blend in with younger people Things you can have tantrums about as you get older So forget the creaking joints or fleeing follicles and embrace the opportunities for mischief and mirth – after all, growing old doesn’t mean growing up!

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It's time to embrace the slower pace!There's no denying it - you're OLD, but that comes with a lot of perks. You can say the most outrageous things and somehow get away with it. You can dress however you damn well please. And after learning from so many mistakes, you're now as wise as you are wizened. It's your time to recline, and this hilarious book will show you how it's done.

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This sparkling collection of golden age wit and wisdom is proof-positive that the stereotypes of knitting grannies and doddering granddads just aren't true anymore – if, indeed, they ever were. Senior citizens are not going gentle into that good night. They're still out there, living life to the full, taking selfies, 'silver surfing' the net and showing the rest of us how to grow up and grow old disgracefully. Because as Maurice Chevalier said, 'Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.' This is a joke book specifically designed for oldies, so look out you young whippersnappers – you probably won't get half of them!

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