Search results for ""Author Scott Haltzman""

Along with changes in the workplace and the explosive growth of electronic communications, there has been a skyrocketing rate of infidelity. Today, up to forty percent of American marriages endure the pain of a cheating partner. The media is filled with stories of married politicians finding their "soul mates" and titillating instances of unfaithful celebrities. But in the homes of ordinary people everywhere, infidelity triggers complex emotions and events that affect everyone involved. Many marriage and personal therapists have adopted a "me first" mentality, prompting hurt spouses to end their relationships. Psychiatrist Scott Haltzman, retired Brown University professor, recommends exactly the opposite. The Secrets of Surviving Infidelity teaches both the victim and the perpetrator of infidelity how to acknowledge their feelings, reduce their sense of despair, and begin the difficult task of rebuilding a strong relationship. People who cheat act much like those who have other addictions, and brain scans of love-struck individuals show a dramatic increase in the release of dopamine, the same brain neurochemical associated with cocaine abuse. Haltzman does not excuse infidelity by labeling it a sex addiction; it's not orgasm that drives a partner to cheat. Instead, Haltzman coins the term "flame addiction" to describe how, like a moth drawn to the light, people feel compelled to have extramarital intimacy despite all the negative consequences. People who have been cheated on feel shame, rage, and injured self-esteem. Many of them fear abandonment and find it hard to cope. When both partners have made a commitment to move forward together, however, Dr. Haltzman validates each person's feelings and puts them into perspective, offering sound advice on how to recover their equilibrium and reestablish a committed, trust-filled relationship.

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Along with changes in the workplace and the explosive growth of electronic communications, there has been a skyrocketing rate of infidelity. Today, up to forty percent of American marriages endure the pain of a cheating partner. The media is filled with stories of married politicians finding their "soul mates" and titillating instances of unfaithful celebrities. But in the homes of ordinary people everywhere, infidelity triggers complex emotions and events that affect everyone involved. Many marriage and personal therapists have adopted a "me first" mentality, prompting hurt spouses to end their relationships. Psychiatrist Scott Haltzman, retired Brown University professor, recommends exactly the opposite. The Secrets of Surviving Infidelity teaches both the victim and the perpetrator of infidelity how to acknowledge their feelings, reduce their sense of despair, and begin the difficult task of rebuilding a strong relationship. People who cheat act much like those who have other addictions, and brain scans of love-struck individuals show a dramatic increase in the release of dopamine, the same brain neurochemical associated with cocaine abuse. Haltzman does not excuse infidelity by labeling it a sex addiction; it's not orgasm that drives a partner to cheat. Instead, Haltzman coins the term "flame addiction" to describe how, like a moth drawn to the light, people feel compelled to have extramarital intimacy despite all the negative consequences. People who have been cheated on feel shame, rage, and injured self-esteem. Many of them fear abandonment and find it hard to cope. When both partners have made a commitment to move forward together, however, Dr. Haltzman validates each person's feelings and puts them into perspective, offering sound advice on how to recover their equilibrium and reestablish a committed, trust-filled relationship.

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Praise for The Secrets of Happily Married Men "Manly men rest assured: You can hope to become a better husband without having to get in touch with your feminine side. . . . Lively and entertaining, this broad guidebook provides Haltzman's insights illuminated by anecdotes from his online discussion forum for married men." —Psychology Today "Haltzman . . . launches his eight strategies with remarkable vigor. More important, they are extraordinarily well fleshed out and convincingly supported with useful 'to do' lists and a multitude of examples. They will no doubt prove helpful to many men struggling to build a happy marriage." —Publisher's Weekly "Scott Haltzman, a psychiatrist and Brown University professor, has been studying marriages good and bad for a long time. . . . View marriage as your most important task, Haltzman urges men, and pursue success as you would anything else that matters." —Washington Post "Men are good at fixing problems, not talking about them, so Haltzman advises playing to your strength. The genius of this book is that it . . . asks politically incorrect questions about men and women at home—the neglected front in the gender wars." —New York Times "The insights in this book reveal a new and effective way for men and women to understand and appreciate each other. It shows what it really takes to create a loving and lasting relationship." —John Gray, author, Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus Marriage and relationships are in crisis. The breakup and divorce rate remain incredibly high, despite all the couples therapy, afternoon talk shows, and other books in the marketplace, many of which describe men as abusive commitment phobic creeps who'd better change fast or else. But this new book is totally different, a whole different way of looking at how to build a successful long-lasting relationship from a man's point of view, men who are happy in their partnerships, who have figured out what works for them in accomplishing the goal of a loving, intimate, lifetime commitment. Dr. Scott Haltzman, Clinical Assistant Professor of Psychiatry and Human Behavior at Brown University, and founder of www.secretsofmarriedmen.com, has devised a proven method for improving relationships, based on a man's special and unique skills, strengths, powers—as a responsible and motivated worker, manager, leader, problem-solver, partner, husband, and father. Men are different, Dr. Haltzman says. They don't approach relationships with the same skills and techniques that women do—and viva la difference. Dr.Haltzman therefore lays out eight ways, tasks, proven techniques which men have revealed in confidential correspondence to his highly successful website, including The First Way: Make Your Marriage Your Job, The Second Way: Know Your Wife, The Third Way: Be Home Now, The Fourth Way: Expect Conflict and Deal With It, The Fifth Way: Learn to Listen, The Sixth Way: Aim to Please, The Seventh Way: Understand the Truth About Sex, The Eighth Way: Introduce Yourself, and finally, Celebrate Your Love. Within each of these steps, he provides both specific analysis, guidelines and techniques based on male biology, neuro-science, brain differences, unique developmental stages from youth to seniority. To illustrate these ideas in action, he's included wonderful true stories, anecdotes, and confessions from the website. The result is a practical, very entertaining, totally original way to build successful relationships for men and their partners, girlfriends, and wives. For a lasting commitment, a continuing guide to solving inevitable problems and bumps in the road, for more fun, better sex, genuine intimacy, and a life-long partnership—this dynamic new author shows the way in a manner that finally includes an authentic male perspective.

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From the authors of the best-selling The Secrets of Happily Married Men comes the much-anticipated follow-up book The Secrets of Happily Married Women. In their first book, Dr. Haltzman and his coauthor Theresa Foy DiGeronmio outlined a recipe for men about growing a happy marriage: treat marriage with the same sense of purpose, resolve, and single-minded devotion that they have for their job. Although that workplace formula works well for men, an entirely different set of criteria resonate with women. In The Secrets of Happily Married Women, Dr. Haltzman tells us stories from real women who are happy in their relationships. These women know how to get more out of their partners by doing less, by not trying so hard to make men perfect, not dragging them to couples therapy, not expecting them to think or behave like a woman. These are women from Dr. Haltzman's clinical practice and culled from thousands of contributors to his Web site www.HappilyMarriedWomen.com. They have learned to understand how men really work and tap into men's powerful hard-wired desire to please women and "be a better man."

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Proven ways to create a more loving family Research proves that happy families are good for health, longevity, peace of mind, productivity, and success. In The Secrets of Happy Families, Scott Haltzman offers an original approach to building family contentment that works for families of all ethnicities and make-ups–two-parent, single-parent, blended, childless, or same-sex couple. He provides a "positive psychology" way of solving family problems through strategy and leadership, including knowing and accepting who you are, taking a leadership role in loving and united relationships, building a network of support in extended families and communities, and making quality time for fun, adventures, holidays, and rituals.

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