Description
Book SynopsisOnce I picked it up I did not put it down until I finished . . .What Schwed has done is capture fully-in deceptively cleanlanguage-the lunacy at the heart of the investment business.-Fromthe Foreword by Michael Lewis, Bestselling author of Liar''sPoker
This hilarious portrait of everyday Wall Street and its denizensrings as true today as it did when it was first published in 1940.Writing with a rare mixture of wry cynicism and bonhomiereminiscent of Mark Twain and H. L. Mencken, Fred Schwed, Jr.,skewers everyone including himself in his brilliant send-ups ofbankers, brokers, traders, investors, analysts, and haplesscustomers.
How great to have a reissue of a hilarious classic that proves themore things change the more they stay the same. Only the names havebeen changed to protect the innocent. -Michael BloombergPresident, Bloomberg, LP
. . . one of the funniest books ever written about WallStreet.-Jane Bryant Quinn, The Washington Post
It''s amazing
Trade Review"wonderful book" (Evening Standard, 24 August 2001)
Table of ContentsIntroduction xiii
Jason Zweig
Foreword to the 1995 Edition xxi
Michael Lewis
Introduction to the 1955 Bull Market Edition xxv
1 Introduction – “The Modest Cough of Minor Poet” 3
The Validity of Financial Predictions
The Passion for Prophecy
When the Bull jumped over the Moon
II Financiers and Seers 23
Big Banking – Nice work if you can get it
Some Assistant Tycoons
The Fruit on the Blossom of Thought
Wall Street Semantics
Chartists
The Pay
The Difficulties of “Earning” Money
An Art Without a Muse
A Little Aptitude Test
III Customers – That Hardy Breed 49
Varieties of Customers
How to Get Customers
Margin What to Do When the Dam Bursts
Some Case Histories and a Diagnosis
Churning Money as a Career
IV Investment Trusts – Promises and Performance 67
Stop Making Your Own Mistakes
Where is the Catch?
The Hell-Paving Construction Company
The Trouble with the “Best” Securities
The $750,000 Bird
By Way of Apology
The Magical Investment Corporation
V The Short Seller – He of the Black Heart 87
For the Defense
A Different Defense
With and Without Bears
Bear Raiding
VI Puts, Call, Straddles, and Gabble 105
What Options are (More or Less)
In Defense of the Pure Gamble
The Catch
VII The “Good” Old Days and the “Great” Captains 117
The I.Q. of a Big Shot
Speculation on Speculation
A Brief Excursion into Probabilities
Down will Come Baby
“They”
Manipulators
A Bowl of Nickels
VIII Investment – Many Questions and a Few Answers 135
Headaches of the Wealthy
A Little Wonderful Advice
Price and Value – Our Special Market Letter
Cash as a Long-Term Investment
Your Way of Life and the Basis Book
IX Reform – Some Yeas and Nays 153
Was it Stolen or Did you Lose It?
Nobody Loves a Specialist
Horizons and Limits of Regulation
Inconclusions
About the Author 171