Description
Book SynopsisTable of ContentsMessage from the Author ix
Acknowledgements xx
Prologue: Lost and Found xxiii
Introduction: Why Feeling Safe Matters xxix
Part One: The Illusion of Safety 1
1 What Does Feeling Safe Mean? 3
Stuck in Unhelpful Patterns 5
When You Don’t Know if You Feel Safe or Not 7
Unconsciously Unsafe 9
Consciously Unsafe 11
Unconsciously Safe 12
Consciously Safe 14
Four Levels of Safety 16
What Does Feeling Safe Mean to You? 20
From Outside In, to Inside Out 20
Part Two: When the Nervous System Is Nervous 25
2 Measuring Un-safety in the Human Laboratory 27
Skewed Measurements 29
A Changing World – Speed, Noise, Demand, Technology 31
3 Your Intelligent Nervous System 35
Introduction to the Key Principles of Safety Science 37
A Day in the Life Of 39
Polyvagal Theory (Viva Las Vagus!) 44
Evolution of Our Nervous System 48
Regulation, Co-regulation, Dysregulation 50
Habituation to Survival – A Nervous System Perspective 52
Sensing Our Inner and Outer World 54
Meanings Matter 58
Social Engagement (and Wearing Masks) 59
All Alone Together 61
Reality Shows and Frozen ‘Perfection’ 68
Safety in Connection 70
Part Three: Nature Cures 73
4 The Wisdom of Trees 75
Magnificent Brainforests 79
The Tree of Safety 82
The Roots of the Tree of Safety 85
The Trunk of the Tree of Safety – Life Passages 87
The Crown of the Tree of Safety 90
The Real Work 92
5 Going Back to Our Roots 93
Early Beginnings 96
Weakened Roots 99
Where Do You Belong? 105
Different Types of Roots 112
The Tree That Toppled 113
Part Four: Doing the Real Work (of Finding Inner Safety) 119
Practices and Resources 119
Getting Ready to Do the Work – Before You Get Going 119
Practices and Resources Index 125
6 Create More Resources – The Reset 127
What Are Your Energy Levels Right Now? 130
Press the Reset Button 131
Getting Started 135
Feel Resourced – What to Expect 138
7 Aerate the Soil/Soul 139
Compacted Breathing 142
Learn How to Breathe 143
Practice 1: Notice the Breath 149
Practice 2: Take 5 a Day/Morning Practice 151
Practice 3: Sigh it Out 152
8 Return to the Body – Embodiment Work 155
Practice 1: Notice Your Body Awareness 160
Practice 2: Locate Your Trigger Points 161
Practice 3: Feel Joy and Pleasure 163
Practice 4: Sense Your Environment 165
Practice 5: Take a Walk in Nature 167
Practice 6: Jump Back into Your Body – Heel Drops 168
Practice 7: Discover Chi Kung Shaking 170
Practice 8: Find Comfort and Ease 171
9 Can I Show You Who I Am? 175
Practice 1: Identify Your Inner Perfectionist 180
Practice 2: Mirror Work 183
Practice 3: Let it Out! 187
10 Strengthen the Positivity Bias of the Brain 191
Practice 1: Gratitude for the Present Moment 197
Practice 2: Wake up with Gratitude 199
Practice 3: End Your Day with Gratitude 199
Practice 4: Cultivate Appreciation 200
Practice 5: Soak in Pleasure 201
Practice 6: Morning Intention Setting 203
11 Safety in Connection 205
Practice 1: Prepare Your Heart Connection 211
Practice 2: Meditation for Loneliness 212
Practice 3: Deep Support 214
12 Healing Weakened Roots 217
Practice 1: Explore Your Family Tree 219
Practice 2: Tree Meditation Exercise 221
Epilogue: Return Home 225
About the Author 231
Bibliography 233
